And jokes
One thing that Miles Morales and Black men have in common is that they're both rip-offs.
What did they find in Paul Walker's glovebox?
His head and shoulders.
What is Juan the junkmail dispenser's nickname? Spic and spam.
I drove through a school zone and found out you can drag a speed bump 😬.
The kid's dad was a magician because he disappeared and never came back.
What is the difference between E.T. and an orphan?
E.T. can actually call home.
My gf/bf said: "I'm dating your uncle!" You cry and you look under your bed and your uncle says: "Damn."
I work in a garage, and yesterday a gay person came up to me and said, "Why won't my car go straight?"
Why were the Twin Towers disappointed?
They asked for a pepperoni pizza and all they got was a plane.
Your girlfriend/boyfriend says: "I'm dating your uncle..." You start crying and you look under the bed and your uncle says: "Damn."
Yo mama so hairy that she got a haircut and lost 47 pounds.
Yo mama so fat that she walked in front of the TV, and I missed a whole episode of iCarly.
What’s the difference between a female farmer and Hitler’s girlfriend?
One bails her hay, and the other heils her bae.
What do you call a nut that screws and then bolts?
An escapee from a mental hospital.
One day I was with my mom and we had no money on the credit card, and we live far, and my mom was hungry.
A guy and his friend had a car and asked us if we were lost. We said no, we have no ride, no money, and my mom is hungry. So the guy would take us for a blowjob each, so I was driving the car and my mom gave both guys a blowjob. We had to get out of the car to look for something, then the two guys went in the car and told us we got bad news and good news. I asked what the bad news was. They said that they're not taking us home, so I asked what the good news was. They told me that they fed my mom and drove off. I guess where they left us wasn't a long walk and my mom wasn't hungry anymore.
One day at school, I made fun of a girl who lost her hair from cancer, and my parents made me shave my head.
The next day at school, I made fun of an orphan.
What's the difference between the Twin Towers and an emo bitch?
The Twin Towers hit the ground.
Bully: Shut up.
Me: I don't shut up, I grow up, and when I look at you, I throw up.
What's the difference between a Mexican and a drawer?
The drawer has papers.
what do baby’s and grenades have in common?
They both are silent but then when thrown at someone make a loud noise