Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn’t last long for fat people
Shower thoughts
I tried to warn my son about playing Russian roulette. It went in one ear and out the other
Jokes about ISIS are all about the execution.
What's the difference between a black & a white fairy tail? White begins, "Once upon a time..." Black begins, " Yall mutherfuckers aint gonna believe dis shit"
How do you know someone has Down syndrome?
they’re doing better than you
a man asked his girlfriend what she wanted to eat one night and she said chinese food, so he took her to china. The next night, he asked her again, she said indian, so he took her to india. The next night, he asked her again, she said, "Nothin." so he took her to africa
What did the deaf, dumb, blind, paraplegic, autistic baby get for Christmas? AIDS.
what do you call a paraplegic cannibal?
dine and dash
I went to a paraplegic strip club the other day, the place was absolutely crawling in pussy.
Why aren't blind people allowed to skydive anymore? It really scares the shit out of the dogs.
your fat and transgender, then would you be condsidered transfat?
They are making new versions of the Star Wars films. The names have only just come out. There is Star wars Attack of the Trannies, Star Wars The Trannie Awakens, Star Wars Rogue Trannie, Star Wars The LGBTQ Strikes Back and then there is Star Wars The Last Striaght Man.
Why are gay guys so rude
Because they’re fucking assholes
What do you call getting gonorrhea from a disabled person?
A slow clap
Why is the white guy in prison scarier than a black guy in prison?
Because the white guy actually did it.
What’s the difference between cancer and my brother
My brother didn’t beat cancer
Wants worse than ants in you pants
Your uncle
How do you blind fold a woman
Put a wind shield in front of them.
I bought my blind friend a cheese grater for his birthday.
He said it was the most violent book he’s ever read.