Lostin Flowers

Now defunct profile on a dying site.

Registered on 9/1/2021 · 27 followers · Last active 1 month ago

Now, THAT'S Gotta Hurt...

A cartoon shows a Christmas tree in a room and next to it is a fish tank containing two starfish. A speech bubble coming from the fish tank says "Now, that's gotta hurt..."

How did Santa feel when he got stuck in the chimney?

Claus-trophobic.

It's that time of year again. 🎄🎅🤶🎄

The image is split into two sections. On the left, "Father Christmas" is shown as a traditional Santa Claus, with a full white beard, a red suit with white trim, and a jolly expression. He is waving with both hands. The right side shows an alternative version labeled "Christmas Daddy". This Santa is more muscular with tattoos, a dark red coat with black fur trim and an intense look on his face. He has a tattoo on his arm saying 'Naughty' above 'Nice'.

Anyone else?

The image shows a four-panel cartoon of a man climbing a hill. Each panel represents a different stage in life. The first panel, labeled 'school,' shows the man climbing easily with the text 'Almost done!'. The second panel, labeled 'high school,' shows the man still climbing easily with the text 'Almost!'. The third panel, labeled 'college,' shows him reaching the top with the text 'Oh yes!'. The fourth panel, labeled 'life,' shows a much smaller figure at the bottom of an enormous hill with the text 'Oh shit!'.

Wanna hear a couple of short jokes and a long joke?

Joke,

Jooooooooooooooke.

The only thing flat earthers have to fear...

... is a sphere itself.

Pretty much

Two guys were beating up someone in an alley, so I stepped in to help.

He didn't stand a chance against the three of us.

...

The image shows two scenes. In the first, a woman is pointing her finger at a child and saying "Your imaginary friend is not real". In the second, the same woman and child are sitting in pews at a church, with the text "Sunday" above their heads.

🤡🤡

The image is a four-panel grid. The top left panel shows a man with a slightly sinister smile. Below that is the same man with a slightly different expression. The top right panel shows Pennywise the clown smiling with a slightly scary look. The bottom right shows a different, more serious facial expression of the same clown. The text in the image reads: "I DON'T LIKE CLOWNS. WHY, THEY SCARE YOU? NO, THEY TASTE FUNNY."

Me

A black and white cartoon image of Tom the cat reaching for something on the floor. The word 'Life' is placed above Tom's head. The word 'Happiness' is written on a dark rectangle on the floor near his paw.

Never challenge death to a pillow fight.

Unless you're prepared for the reapercushions.

My three favorite things are eating my family, and not using commas.

Mr Bean Meme

The image shows two grayscale stills of Mr. Bean looking directly at the camera with a peculiar expression. The text above the images says: "Me every time I see a security camera". The first image also displays a timestamp: 55:10:12:20 and identifier: 31-HNA/10

What does a cigar and a hamster have in common?

Both are completely harmless until you put it in your mouth and light it on fire.

A meme

The image shows a text overlay that reads "Teacher: what are you laughing at? Me: nothing. My brain:" followed by a picture of two burritos, each with the face of Danny Devito photoshopped onto it. The text "Danny burrito" is included in the bottom left of the image.

Dumbbell Door

A Minecraft crafting interface showing nine dumbbells in the crafting grid, and an image of Dumbledore in the result box. The word "Crafting" appears at the top of the interface.

A friend took me out to his shed and was showing me all his tools, when he pointed to a ladder. "That's my step ladder," he said. "I never knew my real ladder."

What goes cackle, cackle, *bonk*?

A witch laughing its head off.

It's true though

The image shows a math quiz with the question: 'Matt has 5 cookies. Alli eats 3 of the cookies. How old is Alli?' The text above the quiz reads 'Teacher: the test isn't that confusing.' and 'The test:'. The quiz is labeled 'MATH QUIZ'.