A day in the life of a Biden voter.
$2000 stimulus check? Nah, $1400...some day.
No more kids in cages? Nah, more kids in cages.
$15 minimum wage? Nah, $11. Maybe.
50k loan forgiveness? Nah. Lol.
No more deportations? Nah, they're still leaving.
Women's rights? Nah, dudes in women's sports.
New COVID bill? Nah, mostly bailouts and pet projects.
Cheap insulin? Nah, jack those prices up.
Defeat fascism? Nah, barbed wire fences around DC.
So there was this girl and her horse would not stop following her, so she said, "Stop horsing around!"
Get it? "Horse-ing."
Life is like a game of poker, guys start by going with them clubs, ladies follow with a set of hearts, guys put down the diamonds, and before you know it you got a full house.
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Rape
Rape who?
I go rape you!
Hahaahahahaha Please comment: Bad or good!
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple actually gets picked.
Why did the wheel fall?
Because there were too many fat people on it.
Why is Sally on TikTok?
Because she wants followers, so follow carcar1431 and xox.meg.xox1.
Yo mama so fat, she died!
What is the best way to make a leaf?
Go down, back around, and stir up a tree. Make it spin, watch again. Oven baking, ding, we're done!
What do you call a blind person on a date? A blind date.
My dad told me a new version of a happy birthday song:
Happy birthday to you, you live in a zoo, you look like a monkey, and you smell like one too!
No offense to anyone reading this on their birthday.
Why does Santa have three gardens?
So he can Hoe Hoe Hoe!
Why does new pavement smell like butt?
In other words you can also call it asphalt.
Ass-phalt.
Why can't Tottenham open a restaurant? Because they have no silverware.
Take a water bottle, shake it, you got piss.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because he/she doesn't know where to run home.
What did the orange say to the other orange?
I orange you glad!
Digga D?
What do you say when a person trips?
You say, "Why you trippin'?"
Why can't orphans play baseball?
'Cause they can't hit home base.