Worst Jokes Ever
Doctor: What is your zodiac sign?
Patient: Cancer, why?
Doctor: What are the chances?
Patient: Of what?
Why can't an orphan be gay?
Because they don't have anyone to call "daddy". (My bad if this offended anyone.)
All these people on here making me wish I knew them IRL.
In a world of feline folly, There lived a cat with a secret, A taste for adventure and mischief, And a love for KFC's golden treat.
With eyes like emerald jewels, And fur as black as night, This feline prowled the streets, In search of a savory delight.
Oh, how it yearned for chicken, Crispy and finger-lickin' good, But the cat knew it had to be sly, To satisfy its craving like it should.
Through alleyways it stealthily tiptoed, With nimble paws and a stealthy glide, Until it stumbled upon a secret, That made its hunger amplified.
A stash of KFC's golden eggs, Hidden away from prying eyes, An accidental treasure trove, A feast fit for a feline paradise.
With each stolen egg devoured, The cat's satisfaction grew, The taste of crispy breading, And juicy chicken, it knew.
Word soon spread of this food bandit, A legend of a cat so bold, Whispers echoed through the town, Of the one who stole the KFC gold.
But the cat with the KFC get eggs, Remained a mystery to all, A phantom of the night it became, Leaving no trace, no trail to recall.
And so, it continues its nightly quest, For chicken that satisfies its soul, The cat with the KFC get eggs, Forever on the prowl, never to be controlled.
Why can't British people play chess?
Because they lost their queen.
Why is Santa always so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.
From the river to the sea, Palestine will be free.
My name shows it all if you can't see, IDC AT ALL, you can ban me.
But let me tell you one thing, Without God, Isr-el is nothing.
So let me say it again, one last time, Free Free Palestine!
A gay guy and a trucker get in a car crash.
The gay guy says, "Somebody call the police! This man just rammed into me!"
The trucker says, "What the fuck did you just say, fucker? Get over here, I'm gonna wreck your ass!"
The gay man then says, "It's okay, everybody, don't call the police! He wants to negotiate."
A girl walks into an Adult Store. "Hi, I want to buy that red dildo right there."
Cashier: "That's a fire extinguisher, you whore."
So I walked into my bathroom to clean some stuff, and no one ever told me you can't put phones in the bathtub!
How do you kill a retard?
Give them a knife and say, "Who's special?"
Imagine a dragon 🤔.
Imagine me dragging these nuts across your face.
Gary Glitter was imprisoned for inappropriate relations with preteens. Not to be outdone, Kelly Clarkson exclaimed, "Hold my Bud Light!" whilst grasping her 1-year-old daughter.
That time when you realize that Osama bin Laden and Carrie Underwood share the same birthday...
Radiohead had to remake "Fake Plastic Trees" after encountering Carrie Underwood in real life for the first time.
Carrie Underwood and ChatGPT are not the same. ChatGPT is able to create a soul.
I'm shocked that Kanye West never tried to get Carrie Underwood's number after Carrie starred in a pro-Aryan ad for Almay.
What's the difference between Carrie Underwood and a robot?
A robot can feign empathy.
Why are obese jokes so offensive?
Because fat people have enough on their plate.
I cannot believe Kelly Clarkson's music is considered pop! More like comatose music!