What’s the difference between a snowman and a snow women?

-Snow balls

I like my cigar’s like I like my women Seven years old coming from Cuba in a burlap sack

What do you call it when hitler puts retards in the oven? Baked potatoes

hippity hoppity women are property

what do u call a mosquito in your language we dont call them the they just come and bight

What do you call a joke without a punchline?

I just watched a documentary about beavers. It was the best dam show I’ve ever seen.

What is 6 inches long and makes women scream? Stillbirth…

how Steven hawking’s died he drove to far a way from the wall and the cord got unplugged

A man crashed his new expensive car into a tree He now knew how the Mercedes bends

Why are elephants scared of computers? Because of the mouse.

What do you call an octopus with a hat?

An octopus with a hat of course


I dreamed I was forced to eat a giant marshmallow, but when I woke up my pillow was gone!

Yesterday, a clown held the door open for me. It was such a nice jester! :D

I was with my blind friend, and he’s telling me “Yeah I can read braille”. So I hand him a Lego brick and ask him to read it. Apparently, Lego has been hiding a dark secret from us for years; as all their bricks read “Screw you, asshole”

What do you call Stephen hawkings on fire?HOT WHEELS WELL SEE HIM SOON

A blind man walks into a bar, and asks the bartender, “Wanna hear a blonde joke?” The bartender replies with, “I’m blonde, the man working next to me is blonde, the woman next to you is blonde, and the fat guy behind you is blonde.” Then says “Do you really wanna tell the blonde joke?” the blind guy responds with "No I don’t wanna tell it that many times.