Worst Jokes Ever
A man is dating three women and has to choose which one he'll marry. He decides to give them a test. He gives each woman a present of $5000 and watches to see what she does with the money.
The first woman does a total make-over. She goes to a fancy beauty salon, gets her hair done, new make up, and buys several new outfits to look sexy for the man. She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for him because she loves him so much. The man was impressed.
The second woman goes shopping to buy the man gifts. She gets him a new set of golf clubs, some new gizmos for his computer, and some expensive clothes. As she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent all the money on him because she loves him so much. Again, the man is impressed.
The third woman invests the money in the stock market. She earns several times the $5000. She gives him back his $5000 and reinvests the remainder in a joint account. She tells him that she wants to save for their future because she loves him so much. Obviously, the man was impressed.
The man thought for a long time about what each woman had done with the money... Then he married the one with the biggest tits.
Is your name suicide because I think about you all the time?
When you're depressed about the world :( but you remember you will soon die :)
Roses are red, Violets are blue, All the worse jokes come from you.
When your legs forget how to work after leg day, I can't climb the stairs.
Michael Myers right behind me. Runs like I'm a track star!
in can re;ate to this its always going through my mind
Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't wanna say this, but nobody cares about you.
Don't worry about missing a shot after yelling "Kobe". He didn't make it either.
Your forehead is so big that the teachers use it as a whiteboard.
Your forehead is so big, you could roast meat on it.
What's the difference between my sister and my phone? I don't give a damn if my phone dies.
What's the difference between an orphan and a baseball player?
The baseball player knows where home base is.
What is an orphan's favorite game? Sims, so they can make a family to have.
You're so ugly, when your mom dropped you off at school, she got a fine for littering.
You're so fat that you only know 3 letters: KFC.
What's a depressed person's favorite drink?
Coff- na, jk, bleach.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana. Jack got high and grabbed her thigh and said, "You know you wanna."
Jill said yes and lifted up her dress. They had some fun.
But silly Jill forgot her pill, and now they have a son.
Why is America so bad at playing Jenga?
Because they already lost two towers.
You're so ugly you make Happy Meals cry.
Why did the orphan kill someone? Because it would make him wanted.