The jokes
Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Ms. Smith stopped to gently reprimand the child. Smiling sweetly, the Sunday school teacher said, “Johnny, when I was a little girl, I was told if I made ugly faces, it would freeze and I would stay like that.”
Little Johnny looked up and replied, “Well, Ms Smith, you can’t say you weren’t warned!”
A teacher asks her class, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” Little Johnny says “I wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive clubs, take the best b*tch with me, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Hawaii, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe, an Infinite Visa Card and to make love to her three times a day.”
The teacher, shocked, and not knowing what to do with the bad behavior of the child, decides not to give importance to what he said and then continues the lesson. “And you, Susie?” the teacher asks. Susie says “I wanna be Johnny’s b*tch.”
Yo mama so fat and emo, we call her the rock and roll.
Yo mama so fat when she walks the earth talks!
LMAO
Did you hear about the cello player who dreamed he was performing Bolero?
He woke up and found out it was true.
Q: Why was the depressed kid sad on Christmas?
A: They weren't hanging like the ornaments on a tree.
Fortnite is just like high school. You get off the bus and start shooting everybody.
Do you know what the F in Orphan stands for?
Family.
Why do orphans have water with their cereal?
Because their dad never came home with the milk.
In Denver, the members of a Sunday-school class were asked to set down their favorite biblical truths.
One youngster laboriously printed: “Do one to others as others do one to you.” —Lee Olson, The Denver Post
One day, Little Susie got her monthly bleeding for the first time in her life.
Not quite certain what was happening, and somewhat frightened, she decided to tell Little Johnny. Little Susie dropped her panties and showed Little Johnny what was happening.
Little Johnny's eyes opened wide in amazement. "You know," he said, "I'm not a doctor, but it looks like someone just ripped your balls off!"
I want to tell you a joke about 9/11... but I'm afraid it will be the bomb.
Why did the deer cross the road? Its friend deered it to!
Me to bully: You are so fat that when the satellite took the picture, you were considered as an island.
Bully: (Speechless)
Why did the prisoner run away?
To spit bars.
Why are orphans bad at basketball?
They haven't learned how to keep the ball with them.
I went to the shops and still didn’t find Lucy’s dad.
What's the difference between a speed bump and a road kill?
About 40 mph.
Why did the Titanic cross the river to get to the bottom?
What do we find at the end of every rainbow?
The letter W.