The jokes
Teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime.
Teach a feminist to fish and she will accuse you of patronising her, claim she knew how to do it anyway, and that even if she didn’t, she could easily work it out without the help of a man.
I went to a feminist picnic the other day.
It was great, apart from the fact no one made any sandwiches.
How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. They just hold it in the socket and expect the world to revolve around them.
Why did the feminist fail algebra?
She couldn’t solve inequalities.
Being a police officer in Nunavut must be so fun. They get to play Cut the Rope on the job all the time!
Why were the mushrooms the cool guy at the party? Because he was a fungi.
Why did the skeleton not go to the party? Because he had no body to go with.
Replace the v in Venus with a p.
What's hard and hairy on the outside and soft and wet on the inside? Coconut, what were you thinking of?
What's long and hard and has c*m in the middle? Cucumber. What were you thinking?
There was a school fire. I pushed the wheelchair kid into the fire and said, "Hot wheels!"
Q: What's an orphan's favorite game?
A: The Sims 4, because then they can simulate having a family.
The Twin Towers ordered a pepperoni pizza. Instead, they got a plane.
Why do midgets run on balls?
Because the grass tickles them.
Your hairline and the universe have one thing in common: they’re yet to be discovered.
What does the cent say when it says hello? It waves.
Why did oozy go to the toilet to eat trains?
Why did the man go across the train tracks to get to the other side?
Why did the man get on the bus to get sussy?
I got a new Lego airplane set from my friend... oddly, there were also two towers included in the box as well.