The jokes
Do nothing about people falling down the stairs, it will keep happening.
Put razor blades on the stairs, it will be their last time falling down the stairs.
Your dick is so small it's the size of a tic tac. Oh, that's why your mom's breath was so fresh last night.
Who wants to hear the biggest joke ever?
My life.
I take debt of 25,000 euro. I spend 20,000 in charity, and 5000 euro are left. I pay the debt of 2000 euro and I have to pay now 23,000 euro to bank, and 3000 euro I have in profit, 23,000 +3000 >> 26000 ;)
What's the last thing that went through Curt Cobain's mind?
His teeth.
What has 3 legs, 4 arms, and 5 heads?
The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
What's the difference between a baby and an onion?
The baby cries when I cut it, but an onion makes me cry when I cut it.
I went scuba diving last year. It was fun, but at the end, I ran out of oxygen.
It was a breathtaking experience.
Did you hear the one about the hills?
It was hillarious.
A kid asks his mom, "Mom, how much do you love me?" The mother responds with, "I love you as much as I love your brother." The kid looks confused and says, "But I don't have a brother." The mother smiles and says, "Well, I guess my love is not existing."
What did the bitch say to her sister when she stepped on her toe? Oww, mitosis!
When it is quiet when you're having sex and you ask your partner to "Do the roar!"
A midget walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender says no.
The midget asks why. The bartender says, "You're a little drunk!"
Why isn't a koala a bear? It doesn't have the koalafications.
A Down syndrome kid asks for an ice cream. The man asks, "Do you want sauce on it?"
The kid says, "It doesn’t matter, I’m going to drop it anyway!" 😂😂😂
What do you call a dog that fell into the Porta-Potty?
A Corgi Potty.
Roses are red, violets are blue,
Get in the van, or I'll kill you.
A brunette, a red-head, and a blonde are being chased by bandits. They are chased to the edge of a cliff and a genie appears.
"I will help you escape," says the genie, "say what you wish to turn into, and you will become that thing."
The brunette jumps off the cliff and says "Hawk." She turns into a hawk and flies away. The red-head says "Falcon." She turns into a falcon and flies away. Now the blonde is alone and the bandits are getting closer. She makes her decision and backs up, then runs toward the cliff. And...she trips and says "Crap."
The End
I hate when I lose my white friends in the snow and my black friends in the dark. Where do I lose my friends from Afghanistan?
In an explosion.
Why didn't the skeleton play football?
His heart wasn't in it!