The jokes
Scientists say I'm made up of 75% of water.
But after jumping in the ocean, it's 100%, just like my depression.
Alicia was not a popular girl. None of the guys noticed her. Once she got a boyfriend, but then he cheated on her with Katy and said, "You're not sexy enough, Katy is much hotter."
So Alicia took a match, set herself on fire, and screamed, "THIS GIRL IS ON FIRE!"
And then she died.
What's the smallest stick in the world?
Your man's dick.
What's the definition of rude?
Sticking a blind man in a corner and telling him to find his wife.
Yo mama so fat that when Thanos tried to snap her out of the world, he couldn't do it, so instead, he clapped her out of the world.
Johny Sin's son checked his father's folder of p*rn in his laptop.
and found that in all the videos his father is...
Covid 19 stopped mass shootings faster than the Government.
Why was the kid not able to cross the hallway?
Answer: The school shooter already shot him in the middle of the hallway.
Today my toilet paper ran across the road, but it got stuck in the crack.
Why is the cheetah so bad at hide-n-seek? Because every time she hides, she will always [be] spotted.
What is the difference between a pornstar and a mosquito?
No one stops sucking.
Say yes if you wanna fuck.
Children are so ungrateful nowadays. I got my daughter a bike, but now she’s crying on the floor saying, “I don’t have legs!”
What did the squirrel say to the dog?
"There are nuts in your poop. I found them!"
The F in orphan stands for family... oh wait.
Be grateful:
You're missing work today because in the past, someone cared enough to leave that banana peel on the stairs.
Love is in the air...
Wrong! Nitrogen, Oxygen, and Carbon Dioxide are in the air!
Why was the cow afraid?
Because he was a cow-herd!
What is Green and Red and goes round and round?
A frog in a blender.
(this next one is pretty bad, and I don't mean it, so don't get offended)
What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench?
One can support an average family.
Why did the Orphan have imaginary parents?
Because his last parents existed.
Why did the cow cross the road?
Because the chicken was on vacation.