The jokes
Knock knock?
Who's there?
Not Sally, she doesn’t have any arms.
Why did Sally fall off the swing? She doesn’t have any arms.
Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a bus.
Why did the dog want a kiss? Because he can see his knees.
China should be a baseball team because they can take out the whole world with just a bat.
I don't say funny stuff because I'm afraid they will take the German passport from me.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
You.
You who?
Don't you get it? You're the joke, dumbass!
When you're the only one nice to the quiet kid.
Kid: "I like you... don't go to school tomorrow."
Hi 👋 I have some good idea 💡. What was the best game I’ve [played]?
A guy entered a library and wanted to get some books to read. He was searching across the books, and the librarian asked him,
Librarian: What are you looking for?
Man: I am looking for a book!
Librarian: Which book?
Man: Facebook.
What's the difference between three dead babies and a Ferrari?
I don't own a Ferrari.
So anyway, this old guy goes to the doctors. The doctor says, "It's bad news, you've got cancer and Alzheimer's." The old guy replies, "At least I've not got cancer!"
Teacher: We have a new student today class, come introduce yourself.
Student: My name is Buttitches.
Teacher: Please tell us your real name.
Student: Buttitches.
Teacher: I’m calling the police.
Police: Son, please tell me your real name or I’m going to shoot you.
Student: Buttitches.
Police: *shoots gun.*
A few days later, the police go to the funeral and sits behind the mom. While crying, the mom says, "My Buttitches!" The police say, "We’ll scratch it, lady."
Why do feminists eat so much pussy?
To get the taste of dick out of their mouths.
Does it cycle now, you stupid bitches?
The cow was stuck because 3 retarded piggies were blocking him.
What did the cow say to the pigs, "MOOOVE!"
Why did the orphan kill himself when he found out who his dad was? Because he found out his dad was Donald Trump.
Yo mama so ugly she the reason why Slender Man has no eyes.
One day I was at church. I had to sit down. I said, "Who in the world stinks?" I looked down. Turns out it was me, and this is not a joke, but funny.
Your forehead is so big, the moon landing was there.
Bus driver: Please give your seat to the white person.
Rosa Parks: Ok.
"Yankee Doodle went to town riding on a computer screen, and then they can see the government has to get Chili's."
What does Mrs. Grapes 🍇 love the most?
Raisin' kids.