The jokes
Why did the rapper carry a notebook everywhere?
To jot down his RAP-SODIES.
Why did the rapper go to the dentist?
Because he had too many FILL-INS.
What did the DJ say to the VEGETABLE?
"Lettuce turnip the beet!"
Why was the rapper always late?
Because he had to drop his kids off at the Rhyme Bus.
Why did the rapper take a bath before his concert?
To get his flow SQUEAKY CLEAN!
Why was the rapper always happy?
Because he lived life on the rhyme side!
Why was the rapper always calm during performances?
Because he had a rap-titude for chillin'!
What did the rapper say to the microphone?
"You better DROP THE BEAT, or I'll drop YOU!"
Why is 10 scared of 11 and 9? Because he's in the middle of 9/11.
What does weed and the Carolina Panthers have in common?
They both get smoked in bowls.
What is long and the line is black?
The line at KFC.
A kid asks Trump:
Kid: "Where are the confidential files?"
Trump: "There they are, bud!"
Why does an orphan hate the ending of Finding Nemo?
Nemo goes back to his father.
What did the drunk emo say to the bartender?
Nothing, she was hung over.
A blind man walks into a woman's bar and asks the person next to him if she would like to hear a blonde joke. The woman says, "Before you tell your joke, you should know the bartender is blonde and has a shotgun, the bouncer is blonde and has a baseball bat, the two playing music are blonde and have pistols. Do you still want to tell that joke, cowboy?" He thought for a second and said, "Not if I have to explain it five times."
Why did the rapper bring a parachute to the concert?
In case he had to drop some BOMBS.
Why did the rapper cross the road?
To drop some STREET KNOWLEDGE on the other side.
Why did the rapper bring a clock to the stage?
To keep track of his rhyme time.
Why did the rapper wear sunglasses?
To SHADE the HATERS!
Why did the rapper become a chef?
Because he was good at SERVING RHYMES.