The jokes
Why does Donald Trump have a fervent crush on the Russian president?
He is Putin his dick where it don't belong!
How did the Emo kid bag all the cheerleaders?
He hit them all when he started shooting his shot.
Hey, I just want to give a round of applause to Shooter McFly, single-handedly keeping the jokes section alive. Unappreciated, well, Shooter, one person here appreciates you, at least.
What's the difference between BTS and Futurama? There's only one Bender in Futurama.
What’s the difference between Swifties and rap fans?
One rap fan has a higher IQ than every Swiftie combined.
If I had a dollar for every time a rap hater made an intelligent statement, I’d be more broke than the rap haters.
What’s the difference between rap lovers and the Gigachad?
Rap lovers get more pussy.
What is the best part about Alabama prostitutes?
Family comes first.
What was Hitler's favorite thing to do to pass the time?
Smoking.
What is the most common crime in Asia?
Identity fraud.
What’s the similarities between a pillow and your mom?
They’re both in my bed.
Why was Wacko Jacko willing to write a song for the film Free Willy?
He thought that the film's title was a nice phrase to yell out in primary school playgrounds.
A bus full of ugly people is driving down the street. The bus crashes and everyone goes to heaven. They see Saint Peter, and he feels bad for them and grants them one wish before they go into heaven. The first one says, "I wish to be attractive." The second one says the same.
Meanwhile, the 3rd person in line is giggling and snickering and laughing while Saint Peter is granting wishes. Curiously, he asks why he is laughing. He says, "I was going to wish that they turned ugly again."
What's the difference between a Nazi and an onion? If you cut a Nazi, nobody is crying.
A kid and an apple fall from a tree, who will reach the ground first?
The apple, because the kid is hanging on the tree with a rope.
Who is the most horny and fat ass god?
Kim Jung Un.
How do you know the baby's dead? The dog plays with it more.
My dad told me "No electronics at the table," so I unplugged my grandma's life support.
Where did Sally go when the bomb went off? - Everywhere.
Why can lesbians not drive cars?
They always strap the wrong thing on.