The jokes

Why can't orphans go to a school field trip?

Because he needs the parent's signature.

Why is the Tower of Pisa tilted?

Because it had more reflects than the Twin Towers.

Please help, my dad is an addict. He won't stop, and he eats my food.

Sometimes I think, should I kill him? But nah, he will go down with the others who did that too.

Me: If a skinny person goes skinny dipping, then what do fat people do?

My friend: Chunky dunks.

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  • I got an orphan an iPhone 6. I told him to press the home button. He has been doing it all day.

    My wife told me to be more in touch with my feminine side, so I crashed the car.

    "I hate when people make 9/11 jokes because my grandfather died during the Twin Tower attacks. He was the best pilot in Saudi Arabia."

    I got kicked out of the hospital because I told all the Covid-19 patients to stay positive.

    Throw a plate.

    It’s broken, right?

    Say “sorry” to it.

    Did it fix back?

    No... that’s the same thing you did to me :)

    Why did my mother buy me a Honda? She knows I can't move, so she pushed my wheelchair with me in it into the ocean. I survived just by a second, but a shark got my wheelchair, fucking bitch.

    My mom told me to get dressed, and I said, "For what? Are we going to the rodeo?"