The jokes

Why did the rapper become a MATH TEACHER?

Because he was good with bars and beats.

Why did the rapper carry an umbrella?

For when he made it RAIN in the club.

What do you call a rapper who CAN’T GET OUT OF BED IN THE MORNING?

Snooze Dogg.

Why did the rapper bring a ladder to the studio?

Because he heard the bars were high.

What's the difference between a dead person and a walkie-talkie?

A dead person does not walkie or talkie.

If you give a man a plane ticket, he will fly for a couple of hours, but if you push a man out of a plane, he will fly for the rest of his life :)

If Mexico is an unredeemable shithole, then how come the Republicans' favorite senator, Ted Cruz, ran to Mexico as fast as he could after a little bit of snow in his home?

The people in Florida yelling "White Power!" is amusing, because when they get permanent sunburn from the Florida sun, they are not white anymore.

Why are Americans so shocked when it comes to Mexican drug cartels?

Because none of the drug lords (or their associates, for that matter) have shot up a school.

Michael Jackson and Kelly Clarkson both did shady stuff to children. Michael Jackson said that there is nothing wrong with sharing a bed with unrelated small children. Kelly Clarkson said that there is nothing wrong with physically beating a small child.

The thing is, though, only one of them made "Billie Jean" or "Beat It", and the other is just a typical karaoke country singer. So no surprise people gave Wacko Jacko a pass.