My girlfriend dumped me, so I stole her wheelchair.
Guess who came crawling back.
Today Me and My Best friend went to the Grand Canyon. He was taking up all the space by the edge and i told him to back up, R.I.P to him.
Son: Dad, if I told you I was gay, would you still love me? Dad: Don’t be silly son, you were an accident. I never loved you in the first place.
I thought opening a door for a lady was good manners, but she just screamed and flew out of the plane.
‘You the bomb.’ ‘No, you the bomb.’ A compliment in the US, an argument in the Middle East.
