Worst Jokes Ever

Popular

Difference jokes

Depression jokes

Twin Towers jokes

Little Johnny jokes

Offensive jokes

Michael Jackson jokes

Stephen Hawking jokes

Worst Jokes Ever

Pull Memes

gta v god

gta v police be like

GTA V police be like
PULL OVER
- POLIS
I SAID PULL-OVER

Heroin Monkey

What's up?
Dude, you're going to
kill me. I was a little
drunk last night and
talking to your wife and I
ended up banging her
car in the driveway
when I pulled out. I think
I hit your daughter's
bike too. I'll come fix it
later, but please say
sorry for me to your wife
Not Delivered
and your daughter

Toast ツ

Men literally never get
their trousers pulled
down to reveal girly
boxer shorts with red
hearts on them anymore

Yuri

What if I got pulled over by a cop and
just made this face the whole time

shaylie lol

Just pulled the door handle off,
safe to say it was as surprised
as I was...

Anonymous

Ignore line & ovals

Faisal Saeed Al Mutar
20 hrs.
Like Page
It must be incredibly frustrating as an Islamic terrorist not to have your views
and motives taken seriously by the societies you terrorize, even after you
have explicitly and repeatedly stated them. Even worse, those on the
regressive left, in their endless capacity for masochism and self-loathing,
have attempted to shift blame inwardly on themselves, denying the terrorists
even the satisfaction of claiming responsibility.
It's like a bad Monty Python sketch:
"We did this because our holy texts exhort us to to do it."
"No you didn't."
"Wait, what? Yes we did..."
"No, this has nothing to do with religion. You guys are just using religion as a
front for social and geopolitical reasons."
"WHAT!? Did you even read our official statement? We give explicit Quranic
justification. This is jihad, a hely crusade against pagans, blasphemers, and
disbelievers."
"No, this is definitely not a Muslim thing. You guys are not true Muslims, and
you defame a great religion by saying so."
Huh!? Who are you to tell us we're not true Muslims!? Islam is literally at the
core of everything we do, and we have implemented the truest most literal
and honest interpretation of its founding texts. It is our very reason for being."
"Nope. We created you. We installed a social and economic system that
alienates and disenfranchises you, and that's why you did this. We're sorry."
"What? Why are you apologizing? We just slaughtered you mercilessly in the
streets. We targeted unwitting civilians - disenfranchisement doesn't even
enter into it!"
"Listen, it's our fault. We don't blame you for feeling unwelcome and lashing
out."
"Seriously, stop taking credit for this! We worked really hard to pull this off,
and we're not going to let you take it away from us."
"No, we nourished your extremism. We accept full blame."
"OMG, how many people do we have to kill around here to finally get our
message across?"

Anonymous

yeah this is true very

GET THE TREATS
OR I PULL THE PLUG

Heroin Monkey

A
1:54 / 4:18
✰ Pull up for precise seeking
1:09

Heroin Monkey

phil
@stillnogf
let's say i got my dick stuck in a ketchup
bottle (which I didn't) how would I get it
out????
1:24 PM - 9/4/20⚫ Twitter for iPhone
4 Retweets 99 Likes
27
K'am @shrimpfrynrice. 4h
Replying to @stillnogf
wait til it's soft and pull it out Imao
↑
phil @stillnogf. 4h
its cutting off the bloodflow and it wont get soft
(not that i did that)

Heroin Monkey

File: 1386105255853 jpg-(18 KB. 300x300. tSrfb2A.jpg)
B)
Anonymous 12/03/13(Tue)15: 14:15 UTC-6 No.519
So /b/, this is the first time I've shared this story
>mother
>fucking
>9/11
>be me
>be 18
>at a house party
>girl is talking to me
>we're wasted
>time to go to the love station
>says she wants to wait until morning
>so she can "remember it"
>wake up in the morning next to her
>she's already awake watching the news or some shit
>start making out
>put my hand in her panties
>she's moaning
>says "what the fuck" in a te
terrified voice
> "holy fuck my dad works there"
>immediately gets up and pulls out her cell phone
>look at TV just in time
>second plane crashes into tower
>she starts balling uncontrollably
That's my story of how I got cockblocked by motherfucking al qaeda

Heroin Monkey

Slavcalibur
He who pulls it from the tree becomes the
king of Yugoslavia.

ur momy

when u look like this but your the only one it the group that can pull bitches but u straight

Headpool

Pulling up to the movie theater

ME AND THE BOYS
WATCHING FNAF

GG Miller

His ass going to jail

A COP PULLED
ME OVER AND SAID
"PAPERS".. I
www.facebook.com/ShutUplmStillTalking
SAID SCISSORS,
I WIN AND
DROVE OFF!!
alking

Heroin Monkey

If you meet a bear in the forest, just
ask him to review your pull request
so he pretends he didn't notice you
and goes away

Heroin Monkey

the homeless man watching me pull
out a .357 revolver and paint the
sidewalk with my own brains after he
asked me for a dollar
&@nickreynaa

Heroin Monkey

MadSlasher
Bird Squeezer
(8)
We the people are
the rightful masters
of both Congress
and the courts, not
to overthrow the
Constitution but to
overthrow the men
who pervert the
Constitution.
ABRAHAM LINCOLN
16th President of the United States
And he died the same way Trump
probably will
Mad5lasher
Lone wo 69 | Mamadroid
MASADAR
Do not compare a man who
pulled a divided nation back
together to a man who pulls it
appart
hace 20 horas
Mad5lasher:I can pull my
buttcheeks apart and back
together without using my hands
AUSTRISS
+8
hace 20 horas
Bird Squeezer:Thats nice dear
-7
+1
hace 20 horas
+8
Memerator 1500

Heroin Monkey

We're so back
ON CNN @CNN - 15h
Giant kites could pull cargo ships
across the ocean - and slash their
carbon emissions cnn.it/3NV8ec3

Silly Sonka

Parties when I pull up:

SILLY INC
WAT
WAT

Heroin Monkey

Anonymous (ID: oFMwmvFk
TRAIN DERAICHENT
08/30/14(Sat) 22:14:53 No.565734034
>the year is 2016
>Hilary Clinton is elected
as president
>immediately begins
feminization campaign
>senate and supreme
42 KB JPG
court are dissolved
>she now has supreme power
>mass castrations
>all privileged white cis male CEOs are
replaced with women
>fast forward 11 years
>Clinton is now supreme womyn of
America
>be me
>non-binary gender half-human half-wolf
otherkin.
>get off work at the privilege checking
center for men
>on my way to the clinic for my mandatory
estrogen injection to keep down my rape
urges
>sit in lobby
>I hear screaming of empowered womyn
outside
>lights go out
>ground shakes
>a figure appears before me
>he pulls off his hood
>looks me square in the eye
>his lips begin to move
"fuck her right in the pussy"
>chaos begins
>mass riots ensue as my testicles which
were removed at birth are restored
>men are raping people on a global scale
>an eagle cries a tear of freedom on the
statue of liberty
>order has been restored
Red by JulyCvet for Fury)
VIA 9GAG.COM

1
2