Miscommunication jokes

An American woman married a British man. On their honeymoon, the British husband said, "You look like a million pounds!" The wife divorced him.

When Kim Jong-un said "nuke the Chinese", he meant put the take away in the oven. Some simple misunderstandings start a war.

Doctor: "Does your penis burn after intercourse?"

Patient: "I don't know. I never tried lighting it."