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Ladder

123 views · Gummy gummy gummy bear · 2 months ago

A screenshot of a text conversation on a black background. At the top, white text says "Nothing like a classic text from the old man". The messages below show a gray bubble saying "I fell off a 50 foot ladder this morning". A purple bubble response says "OMG dad are you ok !!!". Two final gray bubbles from the sender say "Yes" and "Thankfully I was on the first step".

Focus

42 views · Shitpost master-general · 3 months ago

An image of basketball star LeBron James looking extremely focused and intense, surrounded by digital flames and sparks. He is holding a basketball. Overlaid text says: "POV: when the choir hit a high note and the glass dildo breaks in my a$$ so I gotta lock in and pretend like nothing happened".

Cat

28 views · Shitpost master-general · 3 months ago

Mreow meow meow meow :3

A screenshot of a tweet by sloane quoting another tweet by Punch Cat. The original tweet displays two side-by-side images of a grey tabby cat sitting at a desk next to a laptop. In the left image, titled "apple", the cat is resting its chin on a large red apple. In the right image, titled "nothing", the cat is in the same pose but there is no apple. sloane's commentary reads: "notice he is content both with and without apple. a lot to learn here".

Duck

46 views · Shitpost master-general · 6 months ago

A white domestic duck stands facing right on a plain white background. Above the duck, in black text, it reads: "This is just a normal duck, nothing will happen if you like this photo".

Trade Offer

65 views · United Kingdom UK · 8 months ago

A young man dressed in ancient Roman or Greek warrior attire, including a red cape and dark armor, stands with his hands clasped in front of him in a thoughtful or scheming pose. He is positioned indoors, with a large window behind him showing a view of the outside at dusk. Above him, text arranged like a meme reads: '! Trade offer ! I receive: Nothing haha, don't worry about it. You receive: A big wooden horse.'

Song

35 views · RapBoat · 9 months ago

A screenshot of an online poll. The question asks, "If you had to DELETE a song from history, which one would it be?" The options are listed with album art, song titles, and percentages of votes: "4 Your Eyez Only" (27%), "m.A.A.d city" (9%), "Can't Tell Me Nothing" (59%), and "N.Y. State of Mind" (5%). The poll has received 9.3K votes.

Cigarette

12 views · Heroin Monkey · 10 months ago

A diptych of two images. On the left, a hand holds a clear, yellowish popsicle with several cigarettes frozen inside it, filters facing downwards. The background is blurry green foliage. On the right, the same hand holds the same popsicle, but a bite has been taken out of the top, revealing the wet, brown tobacco inside. Above the images, text reads, "Nothing beats cigarette popsicles on a hot summer day".

Masturbation

56 views · Heroin Monkey · 11 months ago

A screenshot of a Reddit post from r/Kanye, labeled NSFW. The title asks, 'Is it still ethical to jiggle my johnson to Kanye songs?' The body text below is a 'DISCUSSION' post starting with 'A while ago, I discovered that certain Kanye songs caused me to become ithyphallic...' and continues with a lengthy description of the user's masturbation habits, influenced by Kanye West's music and recent controversies. It ends by asking for an alternative suggestion like 'Jordan Terrell Carter'.

Abortion

98 views · Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A photo shows a doll that resembles an unborn baby next to text that reads: "If I was a girl, I would get pregnant as many times as possible, then have abortions after the third month of being pregnant so I would deliver a potato sized 1/3 developed dead fetus, then I would take the fetus, put it in a jar of preservative liquid and put it on a shelf in a secret room in my house, and I would do it until I had so many the rooms walls were nothing but potato sized aborted fetuses. Then I would have a kid and when they're bad I would make them sit in the fetus room and remind them of how easy I could have aborted their ass."

Market

108 views · Anonymous · 1 year ago

People will bet on everything... ...I mean nothing.

A screenshot of a prediction market titled "Nothing Ever Happens: May." The market rules state that it will resolve to "No" if Russia and Ukraine agree to a ceasefire, the next Pope is Black, the Fed cuts rates, India invades Pakistan, or Israel or the US take military action against Iran. Otherwise, it will resolve to "Yes."

Hamster

7 views · Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A baseball player is in the middle of throwing a ball. The text overlay says: "Yo can I hold your hamster rq? I promise I won't do nothing."

Letter

12 views · Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A screenshot of a conversation. The first message asks to tell a joke using every letter of the alphabet. The second message responds with an alphabet and a cheese pun.

Mom

14 views · Jeffery Neamiahs Alexander the 5th · 1 year ago

A cartoon image of Fry from Futurama with the text 'ME: MOM WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY ROOM' above him and 'MOM: NOTHING' below him.

Snitch

87 views · Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A page from a 'Diary of a Wimpy Kid' style book. The text entry from Monday, December, reads, 'Today was fucking dreadful. Me and the boys were just watching porn on the school computers in computer science. Nothing harmful. You know how it goes, though. There's always some bitch across the room, just waiting, dying to ruin the fun.' Below the text is a cartoon drawing of a computer lab. Three boys are at computers. A girl, Patty, points at one boy (Greg) and shouts, 'GREG IS WATCHING PORNOGRAPHY, MR JIZZLE!' Another boy, Greg's friend, yells, 'WHAT THE FUCK?!' The text continues below the drawing: 'The next time I see Patty, I swear to god, that snitch is fucking dead.'

Brit

35 views · Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A newspaper clipping with the headline "Nude Brit covered in poo fell from hotel balcony into café", followed by a news article describing a naked British tourist who fell through a café ceiling from his hotel balcony in Thailand.

Price

14 views · Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

The image shows a question at the top: "If you could permanently change the price of something to $1, what would it be?" Below the question is a comment: "it costs nothing to be nice" womp womp now it costs a dollar. Then another comment "Remember how breathing air was free".

Pain

27 views · ✨Jassy✨ · 1 year ago

A 3D character from a video game with a simple, smiling face is standing in front of a building. The character is white with a pink top and bottom. A speech bubble above the character says, "why was i built to feel nothing but pain?"

Brick

4 views · Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

The image contains two parts. The upper part of the image shows the following text: "nothing is fun anymore" throwing bricks at oncoming traffic. The bottom part of the image displays a full-body picture of Mercy, a character from the game Overwatch, who has wings and flies in a landscape with a yellowish and orange color

Brain

17 views · Swf · 1 year ago

The meme shows a screenshot from the game Minecraft. The Nether, a dark and fiery dimension, is in view, and the flag of the Netherlands is placed in the middle. The meme has the text “Geography teacher: what are you laughing at? Me: Nothing. My brain: Netherlands.”

Group

9 views · Swf · 1 year ago

The image shows a cartoon representing different national teams as balls with their respective flags, each in their group for the EURO 2024. Each "countryball" expresses a different sentiment or makes a joke related to their football reputation or chances in the tournament. The text across the image shows dialog and commentary for each country.

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