Lift jokes

Heaven

Anonymous · 8 years ago

I hope there is a lift to heaven. I shouldn’t be making jokes though.

Test answer

LoserIsPro · 3 years ago

Funny Test Answers #6

A test paper with the title "Pre Test - Answer these questions as accurately as possible" written on it. The student's answers are written in ink. The answers are often unexpected and witty, leading to the teacher giving the student an A+ for creativity and an F for the overall exam. Some of the questions include "In which battle did Napoleon die?", "What is the main reason for divorce?", and "How can you drop a raw egg onto a concrete floor without cracking it?".

Lift memes

Mom

Peter Griffin · 7 years ago

Doin' your mom doin' doin' your mom

Doin' doin' your mom doin' doin' your mom

You know we straight with doin' your mom

Doin' your mom doin' doin' your mom

Doin' doin' your mom doin' doin' your mom

You know we straight with doin' your mom

I’m doin' your mom. Yes yours!

I first saw her in the Wal-Mart pickin' out your drawers.

Big Dolly Parton hair like an 80s prom queen

But her ass was lookin' good all up in those mom-jeans.

I approached her in the checkout line, and said yo baby wassup?

She had two gallons of milk, and I was starin' at her jugs.

Five minutes later she agreed to get with me

So we went and rocked the minivan like Giggity. Giggity. Giggity.

I was ridin' your mom like she was Mario Kart.

I gave her a lift back to her crib cause her car wouldn’t start.

She invited me in the house, and we started makin' out again.

How many times I tap that ass? OVER 9000!

Yeah. She called me Pledge cause I knocked the dust off it.

She later made me a sandwich and she cut the crust off it.

Cause she knows how I like it, and that I’m a little young

To be in the bed, butt-naked doin' your mom.

Doin' your mom doin' doin' your mom

Doin' doin' your mom doin' doin' your mom

You know we straight with doin' your mom

Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana. Jack got high and grabbed her thigh and said, "You know you wanna." Jill said yes and lifted her dress so they could have some fun, but stupid Jill forgot her pill and now they have a son.

Human

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image is a four-panel comic featuring the trollface character. In the top left, the trollface is lifting weights with the text "A human can lift more than their weight". The top right panel shows the trollface sitting with the text "1) pick yourself up". In the bottom left panel, the trollface is flying over a city with the text "2) fly". The bottom right panel shows a dark night sky with a trollface in it.

Sin

Tucker · 3 years ago

The image shows a painting of Jesus with an extremely muscular physique. He is wearing a white tank top and is sitting at a table with a pot labeled "100% GAIN". The text at the bottom reads: "Jesus after lifting my sins."

Boyfriend

Anonymous · 1 year ago

Shitpost-master general

The image is a meme with two contrasting panels. The first panel shows a cartoonish yellow face with thick glasses, accompanied by the text, "Why do yuo lift? I lift because I'm a radpilled Christian schizo lifter and I want to be just like Travis from Taxi Driver." The second panel features a black and white image of a muscular man, known as "Chad", with the text, "So I can carry my Twink boyfriend everywhere."

Oreo

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A package of Oreos is shown with the text "All cum OWO" written on the label. The standard text "Oreo" has been replaced by "OWO". Below that is written "What's this!" and an arrow is pointing to the cookies.

Lift memes

Community talk

Anonymous

1 year ago

Prologue + chapter one. Is it all a dream? Charlie knight Thank you to my Editor, Agustas. Is it all a Dream? Charlie Knight Introduction

I remember when I first died. I have no idea how this dream became a reality. Is it a reality?

I was running from something... Something evil, but from what? It was hard to remember. Struggling, I kept running. Soon the hall came to an end. Quickly, I ran into a room, diving… Read more

Anonymous

1 year ago

Scripts.com Bee Movie By Jerry Seinfeld

NARRATOR: (Black screen with text; The sound of buzzing bees can be heard) According to all known laws of aviation, : there is no way a bee should be able to fly. : Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. : The bee, of course, flies anyway : because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. BARRY BENSON: (Barry is picking out a shirt) Yell… Read more

Anonymous

2 years ago

Ode to FeetLust

There once was a user named FeetLust, so sly, With a twinkle of Skibidi in his eye. He danced to the beat of the Sigma tune, In Ohio's halls, beneath the moon.

FeetLust was no ordinary lad, He dabbled in memes, both strange and rad. A master of trends, with moves so swift, In the land of the weird, he'd always lift.

Ohio’s winds whispered his name, Sigma’s aura, his claim to fame. Skibidi's sway, his finest trait, FeetLust’s style? Oh, it's great!

A legend of laughs, with a twist of bizarre, In the depths of the internet, he's a star. So here’s to FeetLust, wherever he roams, In the land of the odd, he's made it his home.

Community