Inventor jokes
A burglar breaks into the home of a weapons engineer. He wants to steal some of his weapons from his strictly secured chamber. When he breaks in through the window to go into his weapons cellar, he realizes that the inventor is at home and heard him from upstairs.
The burglar shouts, "Hands up, there is no escape!" The engineer shouts, "What do you want from me?" The thief answers impatiently, "Well, what do you think? I know what you're hiding here. Get me entry to your armory, right away!" "Never in my life will I do that!" The burglar pulls out his pistol, "Either you let me in, or you go for it!"
"Well, I'll give up, I'll give you my guns. Please don't shoot me." The burglar grins gleefully, "Thank you." "I even have a gun here that I've been working on lately. You can have it." The burglar then thinks and grunts, "Okay, before you open up, you'll show me this first!"
The inventor says, "It's shooting plasma. You can test it on one of my practice goals that I've made while I'm unlocking," and points to a side room where various dummies with targets are set up. The burglar walks into the room with the targets, focuses on the red dot in the middle of the disc, and pushes off. But the gun does not fire plasma or at the target. Instead, the gun fires a bullet at the burglar. This causes him to bleed to the ground.
The engineer behind him began to laugh, "Hahaha! I knew you were falling for it! This is not a plasma gun at all; this is my latest invention, especially for burglars like you: the backward-shooting pistol."
The man who invented Velcro died.
RIP.
I just heard that the inventor of the autocorrect died the other day.
May he rest in pizza.
The inventor of the umbrella was just going to call it "brella," but he hesitated.
I have some sad news. The Australian inventor of the boomerang grenade died today. RIP π
Who discovered shrimp were edible?
Probably the same one who invented the blowjob.
You meet the guy who invented 0, what do you tell him? Thanks for nothing!
Whoever invented the knock-knock joke should get a "no bell" prize.
Do you know who invented paper?
Cai Lun!
βRIPβ Cai Lun.
Stephen Hawking:
Q: Who Made Stephen Hawkins' Wheel Chair?
A:) Tesla
Did you hear about the guy who invented the first knock knock joke?
He won the No Bell Prize!
When the chair was invented, the inventor's friend wanted to know what it did. The inventor replied: "You might want to sit down for this."
I heard the man who invented Autocorrect died; may he rest in peace.
Did you hear about the person who invented the door knocker?
He won a no-bell prize.
What did the guy exclaim after inventing the shovel?
It is ground breaking!