A man went to buy 5 undies, so he said, "Hi, 5 undies, please, 1 for each weekday." Then another man comes and said, "Hi, 7 undies please, 1 for each day, and they'll finish cleaning by Sunday." So the cashier said, "Now that's more like it!" And then another person said, "Hi, 12 undies please, wait, I'm gonna double check... January... fe"
Why did the chicken cross the road? cuz he saw a chic ð
Why can't Stephen hawking's be the real slim shady? Because he can't stand up, can't stand up.
why cant a orghphen play baseball? Cus he cant get home
Why did Hitler turn to genocide after a failed career as an artist?
He never learned to mix the colors.
What did Joe Biden say when he got pulled over?
I'm just a-Biden the law, officer.
Why doesnât Joe Biden visit children with cancer in hospitals?
Because he canât sniff their hair.
What does Joe Biden say to young girls when he leaves the room?
"Smell ya later!"
Why does Joe Biden like cold weather? Because heâs used to being in the teens.
The man was dangling by a string!
I was jealous the day he died.
"Kobe is known for fade aways too bad he faded away."
I actually think Paul Walker was a good man, he did not deserve to be burned alive.
He had a change of race tho when he died.
what would be Joe Biden's name if he was an orphan, "JOE".
When you realize your friend standing next to you is adopted and narrates everything he does.
I just heard that the inventor of the autocorrect died the other day.
May he rest in pizza.
The daughter of an incestuous pedophile goes into the living room where he is watching TV and asks him if she can borrow the car that evening.
"Sure honey! If you suck my dick!"
So she gets down on him but something is wrong. She pops her head up and says: "Dad! This tastes like shit!"
"Oh yeah, I forgot," says the father. "I already gave your brother the car for tonight."
What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas I don't know he still hasn't opened it yet
One time I was with my uncle. He said to me to pass him the marble on the floor. All I heard was my butt clapping with his sausage.
One time, little Johnny was watching TikTok, and he saw a toy that he wanted so badly, so he cleaned up the whole house and did his homework. When he was done, he saw a spill on the table. He went to the sink to grab a cloth, but when he came back, it was gone. He went to his mom's room and saw a drink with the label "daddy's drink," so he drunk it and said, "It's daddy's; he won't mind," and all day he was like the Flash. So he went back, turned the bottle around, and it said "Speedy," and then he said, "Oh, great heavens!"
Why does an orphan use water for his cereal?
He is waiting for his dad with the milk.
