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DoS jokes

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A lady runs into a police station and yells, "Help, help! I've been graped!"

A police officer says, "Do you mean raped?"

The girl then replies, "No, there was a bunch of 'em!"

  • 6

    • Kid goes to the kitchen.

    Mom: What are you doing here?

    Kid: Just checking out the knife.

    Mom: So you've chosen death.

    What do a politician and a minister have in common?

    Both of them will tell you anything to get money from you.

    Why did the Catholic priest suck dick at a glory hole?

    Because someone asked him what he would do for a Klondike bar.

    How do you trick a Catholic priest into using the glory hole at an adult bookstore? Tell him it is a confessional booth.

    What do you call a devil texting you? Travelers on the way. 😈🤣

    What did the teacher say to the fat Turkish kid that always ate in his class?

    "You could do with Ramadan lasting all year, couldn't you?"

    Say hi to outer space. Hi, now say how are you doing to the moon. Hi, how are you doing? Why are you wasting your time? XD lol

    What do you call a man that has no arms, no legs, and sits in front of your door? Mat.

    What do a doctor and a girlfriend/boyfriend have in common?

    They both break your heart.

    Can you tell me the real answer to this joke?

    What do you call a drone that takes the long way around?

    In what ways do nuns and hoes have something in common?

    They both worship on their knees. They are both creatures of habit. They both take vows of poverty and obedience. Once chosen, neither can leave the life. They both swallow their hosts.

  • 4

    • A FedEx plane was carrying 375 fridges across Africa, but the cargo door wasn't shut properly, and only 218 reached the desired destination. The rest landed in a remote village. How many fell out the plane?

    Time's up! You took too long; you only had 4 seconds to answer it.

    How do you put an elephant into the fridge that pushed out the cargo door?

    Open the fridge, put the elephant in, and close the door.

    How do you put a giraffe into the fridge?

    Open the fridge, take out the elephant. Then put in the giraffe and close the door.

    Why did Sally fall off the swing?

    Because she got hit by the other 156 refrigerators.

    How did she survive?

    Her idiot mother tried to pull her out and accidentally ripped both her arms off, but she was rescued 8 minutes later.

    This boy said, "Get your hairline straight." I said, "Girls don't have a hairline. How about you go to the barber shop and let your barber do your hair 10 times worse than he did the first time."