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DoS jokes

I was going home and 3 guys came up to me: an Italian, a Black guy, and a Spanish guy. They said, "You should be a proud brother, your sister knows her meats." I didn't know what they were talking about. They said, "Your sister won a trophy, you will see it when you get home." I went home. My sister said, "Look, I won a trophy by knowing my meats." I said, "What do you mean?" She said, "Well, 3 guys blindfolded me and I gave them a blowjob, each one of them, and I guessed which flavor it was. I was right all the time, that's how I won my trophy." As a big brother, I couldn't be any prouder.

My sister just sits on the toilet with her iPad, then I go to do something at the sink and she says, "Bella, give me toilet paper!" Then I am annoyed, like super annoyed.

Slavery has existed in the western world for 3 centuries, but in the Arab regions it has existed before and is still going on, so why don’t people talk about it?

Because it’s only bad when white people do it.

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    • An old man saw the TikTok trend of people throwing it back. The old man wanted to do it with his wife. The man set up everything needed and did the video. He threw it back first, then his wife, but instead of an old lady, it was ashes.

    What do children and lights have in common? They both hang from ceilings!

    Not funny, here’s another.

    Why can’t China play baseball? They ate the bat.

    I was listening to my children praying, and my youngest that can speak said to me: "Mama, why is Gramma dead?"

    I smiled and told her, "Well, less than 10 years ago when I was 5, your age, my Momma took me into the basement with some hot rando during a party. And 9 months later Shinana was born. One Pedo after another and your 4 siblings were born. The Pedo I met last night told me, 'If your mother's the one making you do this, do what you do best.' I listened and the next day she didn't leave her bed breathing. When the Pedo found out he left me and your soon to be brother."

    She replies with, "Make his child support expensive!" Now he has to pay me 2,000 U.S. dollars every month, like the other ones that ran away.

    Hi, how are you? I was busy doing something right. I just texted because me and my dad were going to.

    What do you call a magic car that I can do to help me out for you and I will be doing a great day?

    Suzy: How did Jonah fit in the whale?

    Teacher: Whales are very big but have small mouths, so Jonah did not actually fit in the whale.

    Suzy: Well, the Bible says he did.

    Teacher: He did not.

    Suzy: When I get to heaven I will ask him how he fit in.

    Teacher: How do you know he went to heaven? Maybe he went to hell.

    Suzy: Then you can ask him.

    So, a guy is taking a piss in a public bathroom. He looks over and sees a short guy with a very large green dick, who looks up at him and says, “Is there a problem, boyoh?”

    “I’m sorry, it’s just that thing is huge, and why the hell is it green?!” The man replies, “I’m a leprechaun.”

    “Really?” says the man.

    “That’s right. And I’ll grant you three wishes if you let me stick it in your pooper.”

    “Anything I want?! Three of them?” replies the man.

    “Anything in your wildest dreams, boyoh, but you have to let me finish.”

    The man bends over, and the leprechaun puts it in. Thrusting back and forth, he asks for the man’s first wish.

    “I want a giant yacht!”

    “Aye,” says the leprechaun. “It’s pulling into your own private harbor now.”

    “For my second wish, I want a billion dollars,” the man says, beginning to sweat.

    “Aye, it’s stacked inside the yacht waiting for you,” the leprechaun replies.

    “Okay,” the man groans in pain. “For my final wish, I want this yacht to be full of beautiful women.”

    “You betcha, boyoh,” says the leprechaun. “The girls are there waiting for you nooWWW,” as he lets out a moan of pleasure.

    The man, exhausted and sore, says, “That was rough, but worth it for those wishes. Where do I go?”

    The little man with the giant green dick, pulling up his pants, his accent now gone says: “Aren’t you a little old to be believing in leprechauns?”

    Why do orphans only buy iPhone XS?

    Because it has a home button.