New Don't Jokes

Why You should never poop on the floor in an apple store? Because they don`t have windows. 🤢 🤣

why can't orphans watch PG? they don't have any parental guidance

being asked for advice: after a failed suicide attempt what advice do you have for people out there as a suicide professional don,t try this at home

why don ́t orphan play baseball because they don ́t know where home is

Q:What did the ocean say to the boy? A:Nothing!Oceans don ́t talk silly!

My teacher said, ̈Words don ́t hurt! ̈ So I threw my dictionary at her.

If you don ́t like my suicidal jokes, sorry man didn ́t know it cut that deep.

like my daddy to bad you don ́t have one

What do you call a fish that don"t play basketball

tails. hey sonic do you need payback oh you are not a fat hedgehog you are a snail. sonic. but im a fat snail because dr eggman turned me to a snail. tails. i don,t trust you fat snail

i saw a poor man and i gave him money and he said, nope i don,t need money so i gave him and he punch me for no reason.

hi got fired oh don,t know which fire oh the that i got burned on the volcano

son. what is 1plus 1 = dad. i don,t know son. its is 2. dad. oh i was gonna say 2

me: what did the twin say to the other twin

friend: I don ́t know me: I ́ll fall with you

Why can ́t orphans play baseball? They don ́t know where home is.

I don,t think I'm allergic to this

Riddles not jokes

What has 4 legs but cannot walk?

What has bark but no bite?

There's a one-story house in which everything is orange. Orange walls, orange doors, orange furniture. What color are the stairs?

What has holes but can carry water?

What is in front of you, but cannot be seen?

What is something you have inside you that is pink, but cannot be seen?

What can you catch but not throw?

and last one

What can rule, but not command?

Tell meh the answers in the comments

like 90% of this was from this link: https://parade.com/947956/parade/riddles/

1 more thing: DoN"t google it or search it up, use ur brain to answer these.

Me:Sister STOP STEALING MY STUFF OR I WILL MAKE U FEEL BAD Sister:No I wont stop Me:Fine im telling the world what u did Sister:What you will see when i post it Sister:WHY DID U TELL THEM I PEED ON SANTA CLAUS WHEN I WAS 12 YEARS OLD ME:BECAUSE U DON ́T HAVE A LIFE

One time there was a happy lil girl then one day her teacher asked how many legs and arms do a pineapple have she said girl: You know those pokey things on it thats how many Teacher says: Thats dumb they have zero. then the next day the girl set a fire in her house and then she burned her legs and arms then she survived went to school then the teacher said i heard your house went on fire and btw you know you don ́t have no arms or legs right the girl said OK then the question the teacher asked yesterday asked the girl again she said what do u call a girl with no legs or arms? the teacher said ANSWER MY QUESTION the girl said OK OK the girl said 13 the teacher said PINEAPPLES DO NOT EVEN HAVE LEGS Then the teacher had to calm down then the teacher said to the girl ask a question whatever u want then the girl said ok and im sorry teacher teacher said its ok i need a break the girl said what do u call a girl without legs or arms someone from the class her name was nia she said a worm she said NO!!! the teacher said CALM DOWN JUST TELL US WHAT the girl said OK then the girl said it.......And yall who is reading my story guess what the answer is before i tell u and btw the girls name is sunny back to story.........she said the answer is A PINEAPPLE then when the teacher was calm she told her to sit down then the teacher read a story The Three Little pigs then the girl went home she got a new house then lived happily ever after