Cu jokes
Haters are hating. I'm still alluring, but I couldn't give a fuck cus this site is dying and boring.
I turned gay because my wife is too poor.
Mom, where are we going?
To your grandma's funeral.
Yeah, 'cause I 360 no-scoped that b*tch in the face.
Why can't an orphan play baseball? Because he can't get home.
Why can't emos have ADD?
'Cause they are already scatter-brained.
Why do orphans dip their cookies in water?
Because their dad never came back with milk. Ohhhhhhhh!
Why do orphans go to church?
Because there they have a father.
Why did Sally fall off the swing? "Why?" 'Cause she had no arms.
Why did Sally drop a broom? "Why?" 'Cause she had no arms.
Why did Sally go swimming? She didn't like not having arms.
Knock knock. "Who's there?" Not Sally, she hasn't come back yet.
Did you leave your hairline at the airplane, because it's going up?
Do depressed people hate swimming?
They hate it because they are already drowning in their depression, but they love it because it might make all their dreams come true.
Are you a marry, because you are my mother?
Are your forehead and hairline friends? 'Cause they go way back.
Why can't a dodo fly? Cus it suicided when it saw you will be born soon.
Why aren't emos and trees friends? Because the tree leaves them hanging.
Why were the Twin Towers mad? Because when they spawned in a Minecraft world, all they got was plains.
The 3 life rules:
1.
2.
3.
Oh, there are no rules, because you have no life.
Three friends go to a water park and meet a genie. "You each get one wish." "When you get to the top of the slide, you shall scream your wish as you go down." The first man went down the slide and screamed "Coca Cola," and the pool was filled with Coca-Cola.
The next ugly-ass looking mf goes down the slide and screams "C-M&Ms" as if he wasn’t just about to say cum—then the pool was full of cu—I mean M&Ms. The last horny-ass bitch is so excited he says "Weee!" Then the pool is full of piss. He was upset the pool wasn’t full of dildos./j
Dad: What did you learn in school today?
Timmy: Not enough, I guess, 'cause I gotta go back tomorrow.
Her: I love Kobe Bryant!
Me: Helicopter Helicopter
Her:.....
Me: At least you don't say save the trees, cus damn Kobe is good.
Why can’t Chinese people play cricket? Cus they always eat the bat.