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Guy Fact #7: *Man goes out for a run* Man: "If I don't reach that post before that car, I'm gonna die."

MY SISTER WAS MAKING RAMEN FOR ME AND SHE FORGOT TO PUT WATER IN AND SHE MELTED THE BOWL AND MY HOUSE SMELLS LIKE BURNT PLASTIC AND RANDOM PERFUMES!!!!

HELP!!!!!!!!

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There should be a section for rizz (pick up lines) do yall agree?

Guys, i was just casually digging in my asshole, like any other human would, and i pulled out a condom, weird right?