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jack and jill went up the hill to do it in the water. jack slipped, his condom ripped, and now they have a daughter

please like this. i bet my friend 20 bucks that i would get to 15 likes before him

if you think this place is messed up look at my content XD it only gets worse XD

Thank you for getting me up to 5 followers. I really appreciate it :)

Mickey and Minnie are getting a divorce. The divorce lawyer says to Mickey: "Mickey, you can't divorce Minnie because she is crazy" to which Mickey responds: "I'm not divorcing her because she's crazy, i'm divorcing her because she's f**king Goofy.

Hi guys, so I have a friend who is really important to me, and her name is Caitlyn. And I'm asking if you could do one thing for me.

So, Caitlyns got a few nicknames, Cat, Katey, etc. But her Worst jokes ever username is 'Caitlyn'. She only just started on this about a week ago and I would love it if you could keep an eye out for her jokes, and always press the like button for her because she really loves it when sm… Read more

Hey! I wanted to thank you all for all the likes! Really makes my day! Anyways, I have some helpful things you could do if your feeling mad, sad, ect! Hope this helps <3

Angry:

Push a wall, maybe you're thinking it's something you want to push. It releases the negativity that you might be feeling.

Once you've calmed down, maybe tell a friend or parent your concerns. You could also go to support, Hailey my friend … Read more

This is completely a waist of time, but worth it at the same time.

*Dad's sitting on the couch reading news paper when wife walks in*

Husband: "This music.. Is the final boss coming? Or worse.. It's my wife..."

Wife: "You jobless monkey... Money to pay bills doesn't grow on tree's"

Husband: "Well it's no my fault.. And I was born poor *Over it* If I was son of Bill Gates I'd bathe in money.."

Wife: "First go bat… Read more

SHOUT OUT TO ENTITY...WELCOME TO HELL everytime I see your icon I vomit lol get a life... hey I’m violet olivegarden how can I help you if you need me to disc someone ill help...

So, at school we had to make a poem about our passion, and I chose dance: I arrive at dance Excited and glad. I look around the room And get signed in.

The warmup has begun We begin to stretch, “To the left, To the right, Straighten your legs.”

I feel free I feel weightless. I dance my worries off.

The music then starts We go from the start, 1⁄2 an hour passes, Hip hop has begun.

Why is dance easy for some, But h… Read more

I like to try and help people out with things like relationship issues or stress. I can be a bit of a beach sometimes but I don't mean to. I have ADD, (Attention deficit disorder) which is pretty much ADHD but I don't have the hyperactivity. It is also known as inattentive ADHD. ADHD can often cause things like:

Memory struggle, Easily triggered (Anger) You get the idea.

Adhd is a very misunderstood disorder/disabi… Read more

Anonymous vent to u strangers: I’m in a relationship i havent been truly happy in for a while. If i attempt to split she’ll blame herself and her own insecurities, and possibly resort to harming herself. She clearly thinks a lot of me but she just isnt ready for a serious relationship and it shows almost weekly. I’m keeping her around in hopes it gets better but less and less do i see a way she becomes worth any waiting... 🙃 fuck man

write dam for fun lets see how much we can get

Japan comited just as many war crimes or more as the nazis did gets nukes and nobody cares

Why is it that when People commit horrible crimes like raping, murder, kidnapping, they get put in jail all jail is just time out if Somebody commits a terrible crime the victims family and friends and the victim if there still alive should be allowed to tie up and beat the criminals to death

Can whoever is pretending to be me stop being a fucking asshole and get a life?

I’m going to get an account so people can’t pretend to be me anymore

sent me a doc that lets me ban people plz I will get rid of rude comments. hope you will except me :)

Soooo I'm gonna sum up what I did in this year (2045). First off, I tied up ZEPHYR and fucked his hoe shay after drugging her. She died in a crash on her way home. Then I tortured ZEPHYR and forced him to tell me all his jokes and I used his jokes to get some real ass bitches. I also got rich off of my jokes and bought this website and renamed it into BESTJOKESEVER. Now all of the jokes on BESTJOKESEVER.COM must be top tier or I will personally come to your house and beat the shit out of you.

when i post this and you see it yell poopat the top of your lungs (dont worry you wont get in truble)(:

1% gotta go bye shaylie and keagan.

Ashton please stop being a creep, you need to know what 'getting to know someone' is too