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Alright, so it’s a good thing I didn’t buy yo fuckin’ Jersey. Riley Cooper on some real shit. I was really gonna buy yo Jersey, I had my eyes set on it, man. I always thought of you bein’ a low-key fuckin’ beast, okay, fuckin’ monster, fuckin’ hog, fuckin’ ball out of control, okay? But as you guys know man Riley Cooper, he came out and used the word [EXPUNGED], okay? Now, I understand that he was drunk at a fuckin’ … Read more

Soooo I'm gonna sum up what I did in this year (2045). First off, I tied up ZEPHYR and fucked his hoe shay after drugging her. She died in a crash on her way home. Then I tortured ZEPHYR and forced him to tell me all his jokes and I used his jokes to get some real ass bitches. I also got rich off of my jokes and bought this website and renamed it into BESTJOKESEVER. Now all of the jokes on BESTJOKESEVER.COM must be top tier or I will personally come to your house and beat the shit out of you.

God loves all, no matter your race wealth. If you are of mixed races or not god loves you.

Pronouns are dumb af, ur either a male or female thats it, comes down to the chromosomes people

Veronica Open the, open the door, please Veronica, open the door Veronica, can we not fight anymore, please? Can we not fight anymore? Veronica, sure, you're scared I've been there, I can set you free Veronica, don't make me come in there I'm gonna count to three One, two, fuck it Ah No, God, no, Veronica Please don't leave me alone You were all I could trust I can't do this alone

I kinda wanna stay here all alone keep to myself and just stay home Having to correct every thought I have might be part of the reason I feel sad But life supposedly gets easier this way Or so they say But I guess I just can't give in When the world tells me no I still feel it in my bones Yeah this is our society but i'm coming clean I'm still a believer Let's call a cab and we'll get out of town Two blocks down we'l… Read more

Honey, I thought you should know That I'm in a hurry I've got to move up north But it's just temporary When I look at you I see your beauty Now my baby boy he's gonna lose me But Heaven's not too far away I know someday you'll visit And I didn't think it'd go this way Can I please have one more minute? No honey, I don't want to go Please know that I have to Look how the cancer has grown I think it's time I go home Ye… Read more

Counting days, counting days Since my love up and got lost on me And every breath that I've been taken Since you left feels like a waste on me I've been holding on to hope That you'll come back when you can find some peace 'Cause every word that I've heard spoken Since you left feels like a hollow street I've been told, I've been told to get you off my mind But I hope I never lose the bruises that you left behind Oh my lord, oh my lord, I need you by my side There must be something in the water 'Cause every day, it's getting colder And if only I could hold you You'd keep my head from going under Maybe I, maybe I'm just being blinded By the brighter side

Little Johnny went to school and right before class started, he pulled down his pants and said “Little fishy, little fishy, little fishy.” After that, his teacher told him to put on his pants and go to the office. The principal asked him what he did, so he pulled down his pants and said “Little fishy, little fishy, little fishy.” Then the principal called his mom. The mom got there and took little Johnny home. They g… Read more

The best person in your life is the one who comes to your mind first after reading this sentence.

pain from you well that’s a nightmare come true beautiful is all i ever wanted to feel from you

compliments mean nothing when i know you don’t mean them and i know it’s not true money can buy almost anything in the world but my love for you

i deserve so much more, more, so much more, more don’t you ever try again i’m not coming back again no more, no more now you find your by yourself go and lie to someone else som… Read more

3 dudes are prepared to become priest.The head priest says go complete one bad deed before you vow your life to no sins.They say ok.The first dude comes back and the head priest says so what did you do.I robbed a gas station he responded.Ok go wash yourself in the holy water to cleanse yourself of your sins.The second guy comes back and tells the head priest that he robbed a bank.Ok thats a little overkill but go wash yourself in the holy water.The third guy comes back and the Head priest says there is no way you can top what the other two did but please what did you do.The third guy responds I peed in the holy water.