Both jokes
Why is September 11th the best birthday ever? No one forgets it :)
What’s the difference between Hitler and Steven Hawking?
Nothing, they're both dead, one painted the walls and the other committed suicide by pressing ALT + F4.
Did you know that Americans fall out of both sides of the bed?
What does a depressed person and a chicken have in common? They both try to fly.
What do Michael Jackson and a plastic bag have in common?
They both are plastic and like kids.
What does an autistic kid and a porn video have in common? You can shoot both of them, just not in public.
What's black and white and red all over?
The darkness of your heart, the dishonor of your lies, and the embarrassment you feel when busted for both.
What do me and an emo kid have in common:
We both like to hang.
What do CG artists and porn stars have in common?
They both composite (cum pose it) at the end.
What do the Twin Towers and my Mom have in common? They both went down on my dad.
What's the difference between a low tide and your hairline?
Nothing, they're both receding.
What's the similarities between the New York Jets and the World Trade Center?
They both fall in September.
What's the difference between my arm and legs? Nothing. I slit both of them.
What do emos and apples have in common? They both hang from trees.
What's the difference between an emo and a banana?
They both hang like apples.
What does Micheal Jackson and a rock have in common?
They are both hard.
What do your BF and the Twin Towers have in common?
They both never get erect.
What do orphans have in common with stray dogs?
Nothing, they are both orphans.
What do orphans and fathers have in common? They both don't have families to go to.
Jon and Amanpreet were in a mental institution. This place had an annual contest picking two of the best patients and gives them two questions. If they got them correct, they’re deemed cured and free to go.
Jon was called into the doctor’s office first and asked if he understood that he’d be free if he answered the questions correctly. The doctor said, “Jon, what would happen if I poked out one of your eyes?” Jon said, “I’d be half blind.” “That’s correct. What if I poked out both eyes?” “I’d be completely blind.” The doctor stood up, shook Jon’s hand, and told him he was free.
On Jon’s way out, as the doctor filled out the paperwork, Jon mentioned the exam to Amanpreet. He told him what questions were going to be asked and gave him the answers. So Amanpreet came in. The doctor went thru the formalities and asked, “What would happen if I cut off one ear?” Amanpreet, remembering what Jon had said was the correct answer said, “I’d be half blind.” The doctor looked a little puzzled, but went on. “What if I cut off the other ear?” “I’d be completely blind,” Amanpreet answered. “Amanpreet, can you explain how you’d be *blind*?” “My hat would fall down over my eyes.”