Are jokes

Roses are red, shit is brown, Get that dick out my ass so we can go to town.

When a family friend passed away, my granddaughter took her three-year-old son to visit the widow. As they approached the front door, she whispered to the boy, “Make sure to tell her how sorry you are.”

He whispered back, “Why? I didn’t kill him.”

I love it when candy canes are in mint condition.

Evan, this is Mya, and your mom told me you were adopted, so we are done. Bye, don’t talk to me.

There are 6 kinds of vitamins. Wanna know how the 6th vitamin was made? Just ask the Ku Klux Klan, they will tell you.

Our teacher said for two kids to stare at a wall for no reason, so I said, "Hey wall, that ass flat like a pancake from McDonald's."

Are you a Samsung Galaxy Note 7? Because I want to explode in you!

Evan, me and your mom are done with you.

I tell short people to reach for the stars.

They are always a bit short of reach.

Why did the turtle cross the road?

We don't know yet.

OOF dislike plz I have no life XD.

All of these jokes are DED sub to pewdipie.

All of the jokes are just abuse.

How do make an adult cry?

Stab him 10000 times until the floors are red with human blood.

Girls are like rocks, the flat ones get skipped.

Three scientists are doing an experiment. They are trying to find out what happens when you stick a cork in an elephant's ass.

In the lab, they each look at each other and decide that they should hire a monkey to do it. The monkey sticks the cork up the elephant's ass, and the scientists wait three weeks.

The monkey pulls out the cork, and all three scientists go back and discuss what they saw.

The first one, standing one mile away, says all he could see was a wave of brown, then it all went black. The second, standing two miles away, said the same. The third, who was standing three miles away, said all he could see was the other two get consumed by a massive cloud of brown.

Dark jokes are like kids with cancer, They never get old.

I was walking, and I saw an orphan, and I said, "Where are your parents?"

A man and a cow are stuck on train tracks, and there is a train in the distance about to hit both of them. A vegan sees this and tries to help. Who does he save, the man or the cow?

Neither. He isn't strong enough to lift either of them.

One day, I saw a kid beating up a fat kid. But a cop came out of nowhere and threw the bully off him. The cop then asked the bully, "Why are you beating him up?" I responded, saying, "I'm fighting obesity; no children should suffer from diabetes and heart disease." Then, the cop pulled out a gun and fired, afterwards saying, "Well, how did I do?"

There's only one gender. Women are property.

Guy 2 whispering: Oh, I got tired of acting gay.

Guy 1: I heard you. Why are you acting gay?

Guy 2: To attract gays and then give them advice.

Guy 1: So what's your advice to me?

Guy 2: That I just know you're gay.

LOL xD