And jokes

What's green and smells like bacon?

Kermit's finger.

What's brown and sticky?

A stick.

A termite walks into a bar and says, "Hey, is the bartender here?"

What is orange and sounds like a parrot?

A carrot.

What's big, green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree, it can kill you?

A pool table.

What's the difference between a silver medal and a priest?

They both came in a little behind.

The past, present, and future walk into a bar.

It gets really tense.

What do Colorado and Saudi Arabia have in common?

It's legal to get stoned.

What did one fish say to the other?

Keep your mouth shut and you'll never get caught.

What's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?

You can't hear an enzyme.