Ambition jokes

How did the orphan become famous? They said, "Go big or go home."

What do Michelangelo and Hitler have in common?

They both used their brain to paint the ceiling.

The teacher is asking you a question.

Teacher: "If your biggest dream came true, what would you be?"

Me: "Dead."

Sixty years ago, Stephen Hawking's teacher got fired for accidentally making an offensive joke. What was it? Go for your dreams, kids. Reach for the stars.

I wanted to be an astronaut, but my parents always told me when I was little that the sky was the limit.

Everyone in my class: "I can't wait until I have a family, I can't wait to study for my dream job."

My friends: "What's your dream job?"

Me: "I'm going to die young :))"

Q: What kind of person has 100% ambition and never gives up if someone gets in their way?

A: A rapist.

I wanted to be an astronaut, but my parents told me the sky was the limit.

My hopes and dreams.

Teacher: What do you want when you grow up?

That depressed kid in class: Dead.

Things I would have missed if my attempt in 2018 worked...

My attempts in 2019, 2020, and 2021!

I'm not suicidal, I'm just speedrunning life.

Therapist: What do you want to do when you grow up?

Me: Oh, I wan-

Therapist: Don’t say to be dead.

Me: Well, I want to be an entrepreneur. I want to sell land, pencils, oh yeah. I also want to sell farm.

"Rehab's for quitters, and I don't give up."

My future is so bright, I need a flashlight to see where I'm going.