You're so bald, when you wear a turtleneck, you look like one!
GG Miller
@ggmiller
If you're feeling depressed, reach out to someone. And remember, suicide is a permanent solution.
You're so bald, the reflection off your head is blinding people in India.
You're so bald, Bob Hope would refer to you as "grandpa."
You're so bald, United Airlines has asked for permission to land.
You're so bald, the Hair Club for Men has elected you president.
You're so bald that when you wear a poncho, you look like a broken condom.
You're so bald, I rub your head to see into the future.
You're so bald, when you wear a turtleneck, you look like roll-on deodorant!
You're so bald, I can see what's on your mind.
Why are bald people very easily manipulated by a shower?
Because when they take a bath, they get brainwashed!
Yo mamma is so stupid, she returned a donut because it had a hole in it.
You want an insult? Right, look at the mirror.
You must have been born on a highway because that's where most accidents happen.
You're old enough to remember when emojis were called "hieroglyphics."
If I wanted to kill myself, I'd climb your ego and jump to your IQ.
It's better to let someone think you are an idiot than to open your mouth and prove it.
Is your ass jealous of the amount of shit that just came out of your mouth?
Wife: "Honey? What do you think about my teeth?"
Husband: "They remind me of stars... yellow and far apart."
She's so ugly, she has to sneak up on a mirror.
Do you wanna lose ten pounds of ugly fat? Cut off your head.