Worst Jokes Ever
Why was eight afraid of seven? Because 7, 8, 9!
🤔 ❓ How do lesbians 😳 practice safe 🙏 sex they put condoms on dildos and then they put dildos inside of their 👄 👄 👄 mouths and then they perform fellatio on them
My mom said she will slam my head into my computer if I don't get off it, but I'm not too worried. I think she is joking.
Why didn't Trump help someone who can't walk?
He thinks she should stand up for herself.
The reason that girls are not allowed in boys' treehouses is because girls can't keep their mouths shut about boys taking turns sucking each other's hotdogs.
Doctor: I have bad news and really bad news.
Patient: What's the bad news?
Doctor: You have 24 hours to live.
Patient: What's the really bad news?
Doctor: I forgot to tell you yesterday.
A man walks into a rooftop bar and takes a seat next to another guy. “What are you drinking?” he asks the guy.
“Super Power Beer,” he says.
“Oh, yeah? I doubt it?”
Then he shows him: He swigs some beer, dives off the roof, and lands with no damage whatsoever. He walks back into the bar.
“Amazing!” the man says. “Let me have some!” The man grabs the beer. He drinks it, jumps off the roof — and falls 15 stories to the ground.
Splat.
The barman says. “You know, you’re a real idiot when you’re drunk, Superman.”
My dad has the heart of a soldier, and a restraining order from the soldier's family.
I'm really bored and I don't know what's up with Prince. He isn't talking to me.
And Freshfry, why are you so mean now?
What's the different between Stephen Hawking and Rocket League? Both of them can't stand up.
I looked in the mirror yesterday. I still have nightmares...
What is a pup's favorite pizza?
Pupperoni
What do you get when you cross a lesbian that is a feminazi, a lesbian that is a progressive democrat, a promiscuous woman that is a lesbian prostitute working inside a lesbian brothel in San Francisco, California, and one of Jehovah's Witnesses?
What did me and my uncle call hide and seek? Naked and afraid.
What do you do when you finish a magazine in school?
Answer: You shoot it!
Why do Catholic priests suck on the cock of a young boy in his parish?
Because it tastes like a Vienna sausage.
Your (DYM 64).
What is the definition of polish sausage?
🐴🍖 Horse meat.
Americans be like: "Here is the US, we drive on the right side of the road."
England be like: "Here in the UK, we drive on the left side of the road."
Russians after a car accident be like: "Here in Russia, road is road."
You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose 👃, but you can't pick your friends' noses 👃 👃 👃.