Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

Grandpa

  • My late grandpa was always popular with women. One day, before he died, I asked him what his secret was. He said, "I inherited a watering hole."

    Bewildered, I replied, "What does that have to do with anything?"

    "I could easily get anyone wet because I was well endowed."

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  • Guy

  • Two guys were beating up someone in an alley, so I stepped in to help.

    He didn't stand a chance against the three of us.

    Land

  • This Native American won't stop talking bad about me, so I said, "Please stop acting like you first discovered this land belonged to your ancestors!"

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  • Plane

  • Give a man a plane ticket, and he’ll fly for a day.

    Push a man from a plane, and he’ll fly for the rest of his life.

    Sister

  • SOOOO my sister said her first bad word yesterday. "Shit." My mum was like, "What did you just say, child?"

    Sister: "I said the cat shits inside like the dog shi- uh oh......"

    Now I've avoided this stuff by making my own word: Sugarplum. Sugarplum = shit...

    My sister made some pie, and it tasted horribly... so I said this.... "This pie is very sugarplum-y." She said, "What do you mean by that?" I said, "It tastes like sugarplums..."

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