Will Jokes

After long consideration, I’ve decided to get a zebra tattoo on my wrist. Not like anyone will notice the difference.

Go fuck yourself cause I doubt anyone else will 💅

What's the difference between America and a bottle of milk? -- In 200 years the milk will have developed a culture.

Don't pick flat chest because they will turn their backs on you twice

I was beefin wit a dude and a wheel chair so I took his wheel chair and threw it across the street and told him walk it off u will be fine

A: she looks good when she opens her hair.😮 B:you will look good when you will open your wallet. 👛

Coronavirus walks into a bar and tells the bartender, "Gimme a shot of whiskey, will ya?"

The bartender says, "Sorry. We don't serve viruses here."

Corona replies, "Well, you're not a very good host."

To all you who can't understand using jokes as coping mechanism... you know what i will ask of you:)

Donald: If I lose this election, I will leave the country.

Joe: Bi den

- Mommy, what will i be when i'm grown up? - Shut Up Sam, you've got cancer!

One day, the teacher asks a boy, "Why can't fish talk underwater?" The kid says, "If I put your head underwater, will you be able to talk?"

I will never forget my grandfathers last words. “The fuck you doing whit that knife

guys don’t let nobody hurt you with words like someone once said sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me

Your mom is so fat that if she sits on top a gas station, she will lower the prices.

One hat told another hat to stay behind, and he will go on a-head.

Rape can happen to anybody, so I think I will continue taking the short cut home through the dark alleyways wearing barely anything and walk really close to bushes

Having an abortion will make you so tired.... it literally sucks the life out you.

Why was Wacko Jacko willing to write a song for the film Free Willy?

He thought that the film's title was a nice phrase to yell out in primary school playgrounds.

Russian Santa Claus- You better watch out, You better not cry, cause if you do I will stab your fucking eye, Russian Santa Claus does not fuck around. He's making a list, He's checking it twice... You better leave out some Vodka with ice!