Will Jokes

What did the rapist say to his victim. Go ahead call the police we will see who comes first.

Theres an outbreak of the foot and mouth disease, it can affect pigs and cows.

I hope my teacher will be ok

A priest asks the convicted murderer at the electric chair, "Any last requests?" "Yes," replied the murderer, "Will you please hold my hand?"

Now that Stephen Hawking is dead the jokes will start to roll in just like he used to.

If I make a summer camp for kids with concentration problems will it be a Concentration Camp?

My grandpa said “your generation relies to much on technology” I said “we will see abt that” and I unplugged his life support :)

I recently was told by my therapist to stop with the suicide jokes. So I replied with "Don't worry, it will all end soon"

pilot: *over intercom* we're all going to die

passengers: *start freaking out*

pilot: all of us will one day, no one knows when

passengers: *sigh with relief*

pilot: but it'll probably be when we hit that mountain

why cant asian play base ball - because they will eat the bat

I was watching the local chief police in America, he said we will never forget 911. I thought i should hope not its your phone number.

what can you say to make a rape victim feel better?

"it will be over soon"

And the lord said unto john come forth and you will receive eternal life, but john came fifth and won a toaster

I was working in a IPhone store in Norwich, when an man came! He said "Give me hat-trick or i will destroy your store!" I said "No" and he started to smash phones! I imidiatelly screamed "Important game" and he disappeared! Shame on you penaldo for ruining my store! 😡😡

What is a pirate's favorite letter?

You'd think it'd be R, but really his heart will always belong to the C.

Due to the rising cost of ammunition there will be no warning shots

whats the difference between Tyler and a rooster? A rooster says cock a doodle doo, Tyler says any cock will do.

If you watch " jaws" backward it will be a heartwarming story about a shark who giving arms and legs to disable people

Patient: “Doctor my bottom hurts” Doctor: “Can you tell me exactly where it hurts?” Patient: “Right around the entrance” Doctor: “As long as you call it the entrance it will hurt”