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Twitter for iPhone jokes

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Heart

Based Shadow

The image shows a tweet by user amyroses saying "don't break peoples hearts! they only have one :(". Below that, user shadow replied saying "yeah break their bones, they have 206."

Fear

dd flat fr

A tweet by @TokyosVz that says: "you attract what you fear" AAHHH two latinas who goin tie me down and give me a foot job until I have a seizure AAHHH.

Twitter

The image is a four-panel meme. The upper left and lower left panels show hands making origami. The upper right and lower right panels show Pope Francis looking contemplatively at the origami.

Heart

The image shows a tweet from amy @amyroses saying "don't break peoples heart! they only have one :(" and a reply from shadow @anyway-WOAH saying "yeah break their bone, they have 206."

Memes

Memes

jesse
@oneinchweenie
is anal squirting a thing or did this
bitch just shit on my bed
10:37 PM 11/7/19 Twitter for iPhone

Boob

A screenshot of a tweet. The tweet says: "using my boobs as stress balls."

Dick

A Twitter post with a user asking a hypothetical question about getting their penis stuck in a ketchup bottle, followed by two replies.

People

The image contains four screenshots of tweets. The first by Beans After Dark says "british people be like im bri ish". The second by ryan says "british ppl wake up in a bathtub full of ice with their kidneys gone n be like 'right. what's all this then?'". The third by quinn says "British people could watch their family be murdered and be like 'hmmm i dont quite fancy that'". The fourth by Caleb says "British people be like 'litchrally'"

Man

The post shows two images of a brown stuffed bear toy called 'DJUNGELSKOG' with the text 'i don't want a man i just want a djungelskog' above them. The price is shown as '25'. There are stars and text underneath.

Mask

A screenshot of a tweet that reads: "pussy tighter than an aztec clay face mask."

Lgbt

A screenshot of a Tweet by Mc Donald's that says: "LGBT pissing me the fuck off tonight."

Kid

A tweet that reads: "Nutted in her braces now my kids behind bars."

Compliment

This is so bad

A screenshot of two tweets. The first tweet is from Caitlyn Jenner, it reads "It's so hard to find a straight man that is confident enough to compliment me on my looks.". The second tweet is a reply from Donald J. Trump, and it reads "Nice balls."

Memes

Drake and 21 put both of they meat in
my ears and nutted at once with this
new album
12:28 AM 11/4/22 Twitter for iPhone
4,566 Retweets 1,863 Quote Tweets 40.8K Likes
peazy
27
@sleazyyp-7h
Replying to @OvOBrezzzy
just say the album good nigga wtf

Sex

A screenshot of a tweet that reads "stop being horny. find jesus @stopthehorny. I am CRYING because people have sex. Please stop." The tweet was posted on April 4, 2021, at 6:02 PM via Twitter for iPhone. It has 737 retweets, 49 quote tweets, and 2,557 likes.

Nerd

$A tweet that reads: "imagine you getting jumped by a bunch of nerds and they say 'split that mf into fractions' with a skull emoji at the end.$

Head

A screenshot of Twitter posts. The first post reads, "some of y'alls kids got some BIG ass heads." The following comments respond to this observation about head size.

Healing

A Twitter post which reads, "aint been horny in 5 minutes i think im healing."

Dick

A screenshot of a tweet that reads: "I hate it when I say 'suck my dick' and people say 'Oh but you don't have a dick,' you fools. Blithering idiots. I mean my soul dick. My metaphorical penis. I don't have a physical penis protruding from my body but the aura is there. Suck my spirit dick, peasant."

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