Theses

Theses jokes

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911

  • All these jokes are plane wrong. My uncle died in 9/11. At least he died doing what he loved, flying planes.

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  • Orphan

  • "Come on, man, give the orphans a break with these jokes."

    "No, not until their parents pick them up."

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    Emo kid

  • What do you call a group of Emo kids?

    Suicide Squad.

    What jumps and never let's go?

    An Emo kid.

    I bet all Emos want to be like their biggest influencers some day.

    Dead.

    Why do Emos want to be the "Scene" these days?

    The only thing I've "Scene" from them is their suicide rate climbing, it's starting to climb quicker than they did to get to the top of whatever they jumped off.

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    Racist

  • Everything is so racist these days, you can't even say "black paint" anymore. You now have to say "Tyrone can you please paint that wall?"

    Man

  • A man boards a plane with six children of various ages.

    After the plane takes off, a woman sitting behind the man asks him, “Are all of them yours?”

    “No,” the man responds. “I work for a condom company and these are some of the customer complaints.”

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    Suicide

  • To everyone saying, "Don't joke about suicide, it's not even funny to laugh about people dying." Do you think we have it easy? Have you ever thought these jokes were helping us to cope? Mind your own business and don't make assumptions on people you know nothing about, please and thanks.

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  • Funeral

  • I was at a funeral for some kids in a school shooting. I don't understand why everyone was so sad, so I asked a lady, "what's so sad?" and she said "What do you think was running through these kid's heads before they died?" I replied "probably a bullet". She gasped and said "do you have any idea how insensitive that is? What do you think is running through their parent's heads?" I said "probably all the money they're losing from this funeral."

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    Orphan

  • I keep getting these letters from this little girl every year on Father's Day. I told the orphanage to stop letting her send these.

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    Day

  • I won't reply to every joke today because I want to say thanks to everyone for making funny jokes here. Every time I have a bad day (almost everyday), I always go here and read relatable jokes. It makes me happy and it's making me less anxious. I am really stressed with my school work and everything; I feel that I'm being left alone. Everyone compares me to others and all I can do is listen. I don't get enough sleep because of it... Reading these jokes entertains me and makes me laugh so hard.

    I apologize for my grammar.

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