Their jokes
Say what you will of pedophiles, but you can't ignore their problem with immature ejaculation.
If you ever get mad at an orphan, punch them in the face... What are they going to do, tell their parents?
If you ever get bored, just punch an orphan. I mean, what are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Three women—a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead—are riding through the desert on a dune buggy. About two hours later, their vehicle dies with no gas, and they're forced to travel to their destination on foot, but they all agree to carry something with them.
The brunette brings canteens of water.
The redhead takes a large beach umbrella.
The blonde somehow rips off the car door.
The redhead asks her, "Why did you take the whole car door?"
To which the blonde replied, "So I can roll down the window in case it gets too hot."
What do Will from "Stranger Things" and the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air have in common? They're both named Will, and their lives both got flipped, turned upside down.
Why do elephants paint their toes red, blue, green, orange, brown, and yellow?
So they can hide in a bag of M&Ms.
I live in a world made of cheese. Someone stubbed their toe and screamed, "Cheese-its, Christ!"
If you want to punch someone, just punch an orphan. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
One day, there was an ugly barnacle. It was so ugly that everyone died. The end!
A little girl and a little boy are taking a bath together when the little girl looks down and asks, "What's that?"
The little boy says, "That’s my little red race car."
Ten minutes later, the boy looks down and asks, "What's that?"
The little girl says, "That’s my little red race car garage."
So later that night, the little boy asks the little girl if he can put his little red race car in her little red race car garage. She said yes, and then they pull down their pants and the boy tries putting his little red race car in her garage, but it won’t fit.
Downstairs, the mother hears an ear-piercing scream and runs up the stairs, flips on the lights and sees blood on the floor. The mother asks, "What happened?"
The little girl says, "We tried putting his car in my garage and it wouldn’t fit, so I cut the back wheels off."
If you ever get bored, just hit an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Four cows went to the county fair. They saw a sign that said that next year animals can enter a singing contest. They decided that they would enter next year. So they called their group the "4 Cs Quartet" since their names were Clementine, Candy, Cookie, and Columbine.
They discovered how they could win. After a discussion, they decided to eat as much corn as possible, so they would sing in perfect 4 part hominy.
Is it bad to hit an orphan?
What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Well... I mean, they could go to church and try to gather that someone hit them.
A sibling went up to their other sibling and said, "Dad said you're adopted."
The other sibling said, "You are, too."
Then the first sibling goes, "No, I'm not."
And the sibling says, "We're twins."
The other kid goes, "And you're adopted... oh."
Where do you think all the orphans went?
In the World Trade Center, I trapped them in so they can finally get to their parents.
If you are ever mad, punch an orphan.
What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
If you ever get mad at a person that crumpled their leg, don't forget that they can hide, but they can't run.
Q: Why do men say "ladies first?"
A: So they can look at their a**.
Why do men sag their pants so low and still wear a belt?
The same reason women bring their purse on a date and don't pay.
Why did the orphan cross the road? They thought they saw their mother.