The jokes
9/11 pilots are the best readers.
They went through 30 stories in less than an hour.
Q. What's the best part about 28 year olds?
A. There's 20 of them!
A man asked his girlfriend what she wanted to eat one night, and she said "Chinese food," so he took her to China. The next night, he asked her again. She said, "Indian," so he took her to India. The next night, he asked her again. She said, "Nothin'," so he took her to Africa.
You tell your dad what one plus one is and he says five. You forgot that your dad's brain is on the floor.
I give bubblegum to the homeless so they can chew it and still be hungry.
One day, the fat kid came up to me and asked me, "What's cracking?" The floorboards, you idiot. You're causing a 9.7 Richter scale earthquake and asking ME what's cracking. It would be best if you looked down for a second.
Why did the stairs move?
Because it was up to something!
I got kicked out of the library for putting the Women's Rights book in the fantasy section.
I was lip to lip yesterday, and now I can't get the cum out of my mouth.
Why do I love a block? Because I can fall off the stairs.
Why did the student at Blacktown Girls cross the road? To go to heaven. HAHAHA
Why did the chicken nugget cross the road?
To get cooked by KFC.
I'm the joke 😈😈😈 HAHHAHAAHHAHA Delilah my kitten meow meow to the woof woof.
Why do the police never catch the orphan?
The orphan is not wanted.
Spell 'Imap' and say 'ness' at the end.
Comebacks when someone say: Bully: "Your teeth is so yellow that when you start smiling you slow down the traffic." Say: "At least its brighter than your future."
Yo mama is so ugly, when she went trick or treating on Halloween 2016, the clowns thought she was their supreme leader.
I'm jealous of the people who never met you.
You are so fat that when you go out to check your letterbox, it measures 8 on the Richter scale.
Your mom is so overweight that she broke the stairway to heaven.