The jokes
What do tigers wear in the winter?
A striped sweater.
How do we know that the ocean is friendly? It waves.
Nobody:
The Vietcong when America lands on their beaches:
tReE pOwErS aCtIvAtE!
What did the orphan say to the parent?
Oh, wait!
Why did the frog cross the road?
To show his gang that he had guts.
What did one Koala say to the other?
"Help me I'm burning. Aaaugh!!! Oh fuck oh fuck I'm on fire!! AAAAaugh!"
What is the most musical part of a chicken?
The drumstick.
What is the difference between a Taliban outpost and a Pakistani primary school?
I don't know... I just fly the drone.
The orphanage said I couldn't go home.
Your dad is gone.
Why did the turkey cross the road twice?
To prove he wasn’t a chicken!
Why can’t the employee tell dirty laundry jokes?
Because they always come out clean.
Why did the skunk 🦨 sleep 💤 under a car?
Because he wanted to wake up oily.
A man once ate the left side of a person. One guy watching asked if the guy he was eating was okay. The man eating him said, "No... it's okay, he's all right now."
1. You're so dumb, you think Cheerios are donut seeds!
2. You're so fat, you could sell shade!
3. You're just like coconut water, nobody likes you!
4. Have you been shopping lately? Because they're selling lives around the corner, you should go get one!
If being ugly was a crime, you would get a life sentence!!
Are these good?
Hey, can't wait to meet you! So join the crippling depression family!!
Where were the first orange trees 🍊🌳 planted?
In Orange County.
When did “yo” mean Hello?
They are so different, how did they come to mean the same thing? Did someone just walk up and accidentally say “llo” instead of hello and people were just like “what did you say?” and the man being embarrassed just made up a story and say “oh, I said yo, which means hello in my original language."
Maishah the poo turned into a fart, which is the big fart monster's best friend. This is her: 🐷🐷🐷🐷🤢🤢🤢💩💩💩💩👊🏻👊🏻👊🏻👊🏻👊🏻🐽🐽🐽
What did the poo say to the fart:
You blow me away!
Her last name starts with "A" and ends with "D," and the middle letters are "P-O-O."