The jokes

So I went to Comic-Con and saw a man with an arm missing, and I thought, "Cool display," until I heard him screaming and getting the other arm chopped off. Then I said, "Man, now that's a 10/10 display, wow!"

What's the difference between an emo kid and a pack of Oreos? The bar code on the emo kid gets longer every day.

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  • You find some dust on the ground. Your friends dare you to snort it... Then you realize you're in a crematorium.

    My son asked me what dark humor was, so I told him, "see that kid in the wheelchair, ask him to stand." He said, "But Dad I'm blind." Exactly.

    "Sonic Says", "If you're ever bored and have nothing to do, then just punch an orphan in the face. Who are they gonna tell? Their parents?"

    Q: Why didn't the Oak tree win the election?

    A: He didn't get the votes he was oaking for, because he was not the popular vote.

    Stop with the emojis. They kinda just make the joke cringy. For example: How many ppl 🤷🤷🤷🤷🤷🤷🤷🤷 does it take to have 🥒🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑???? Well, it takes at least 1 🤷 and 1 👰 and they make a perfect ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🤎🖤. See how cringy it is. I mean sure, it's a dumb example, but still, just at least less emojis.

    Did you know the "f" in "orphan" stands for family?

    Kid: There is no "f" in "orphan."

    There is no family.

    "Give it to me! Give it to me!" she yelled. "I'm so wet, give it to me now!" She could scream all she wanted, but I was keeping the umbrella.

    What’s the difference between an emo and grass? The grass doesn’t cut itself :D