Sick fuck jokes

I walk in from work to find my wife dead on the sofa.

As I unzip for one last ride, she says, "BOO!" What kind of sick fuck does that?

Two guys are captured by native Chinese. They give them two choices: 1. Death. 2. 他妈的

The first guy: What's 他妈的?

The Chinese: Fucking.

The first guy chooses death.

Second guy to himself: Well, I'll let these sick fucks fuck me. At least I'll be alive...

The Chinese: Come on, we don't have all day.

Second guy: I choose 他妈的.

The Chinese: Ok, 他妈的 to the death!

P1: What's the difference between a kid and a hooker?

P2: I don't know.

P1: Wow, you sick fuck!

If you read this, you fucked your dad and your 4-year-old sister, you sick fuck... At least wait till they are 15.

I got mad at my sister's boyfriend, so I fucked his girl.

So I'm banging the fuck out of this slutty chick, right?

And I'm thinking to myself, "She's PROBABLY got AIDS." So I go and get myself tested and, lo and behold, I'm positive.

This gets me thinking, "Where the fuck does an eight year old get AIDS?!"

"Who has my sister been hanging out with?!"

Yesterday I was fucking my sister, and she said, "You fuck a lot like dad." I said, "Really? Mum said that too."

Kenny can't find a girlfriend because neither of his sisters can fuck as good as his mom could.

Pedophiles are fucking immature assholes.

Not done yet.

Now they are.