Round The Corner jokes

There were once three brothers, Shit, Shut up, and Manners. One day, Shit got hit by a car. Shut up went to find help at the local police station while Manners tried to help Shit.

When Shut up got to the police station he says, "My brother has just been hit by a car."

The policeman replied with, "OK then, first I need to know your name."

"Shut up."

"No, I need to know your name."

"Shut up."

"Excuse me, but where are your manners?"

"Round the corner picking up shit."

It's embarrassing when there is no toilet paper and you need to go and get one with your pants down. Luckily, the supermarket is just around the corner.

A physicist, an engineer and a programmer were in a car driving over a steep alpine pass when the brakes failed. The car was getting faster and faster, they were struggling to get round the corners and once or twice only the feeble crash barrier saved them from crashing down the side of the mountain. They were sure they were all going to die, when suddenly they spotted an escape lane. They pulled into the escape lane, and came safely to a halt.

The physicist said, "We need to model the friction in the brake pads and the resultant temperature rise, see if we can work out why they failed."

The engineer said, "I think I've got a few spanners in the back. I'll take a look and see if I can work out what's wrong."

The programmer said, "Why don't we get going again and see if it's reproducible?"

When you hit a speed bump in a school zone and remember, there are no speed bumps.

The happier they get, the less they see.

You wanna know why I hate circles so much? They’re just so pointless! But I guess that’s how they roll.

How did Helen Keller's mom punish her? She put her in a circular room and told her to find the corner.

What's one thing gay people can't draw?

A straight line.