Right Hand jokes
Today, there was a big test for Little Timmy. During the test, Timmy had to take a really huge shit. So, he rushed to the bathroom. He took a while in there.
When he was done, he realized there was no more toilet paper left. Since there was nothing around him to use, the only thing he could do was wipe with his hand. His time in the bathroom was up, and he needed to finish that test! He didn’t have time to wash his hands. So, he hurried back. The problem was, the hand he wiped with was his right hand. He used his left hand to complete the test, which made him fail. When he got home, his mother was standing there crossing her arms. “Timmy, the teacher had called and said you wrote sloppy on your test. Why is that?” Timmy replied, “Oh, it’s because I caught a leprechaun with my right hand, but if I opened it, my classmates would scare him away, so I had to use my left.” Timmy’s mother glared at him with disbelief. “Timmy, I don’t believe you. Now open your hand!” Timmy did so and opened his hand. “See, mother? I said you’d scare the shit out of him!”
Memes
There once was a man that wanted to join a group of right-handed men, but he wrote with the other hand. He got left behind.
Why does Helen Keller use her left hand to play with herself?
So she can moan with her right hand.
Look at your left hand, now look at your right hand, and tell yourself, "Which hand do you cheat with?"
Wanking.
Community
Dear Sarah,
Your last comment was 3 days ago. You use your phone about 3-4 hours daily. You have a boyfriend, and possibly are in the field of medicine, although I can't be sure. You're right handed. (By "possibly" in the field of medicine I mean you don't seem to be in it yet, but you may be working towards it.) Ok, so you're definitely not in the field yet and are most likely in high school. You like horror, and y… Read more
WHAT A FUCKING DAY. I GOT INTO A FIGHT BECAUSE THIS ASSHOLE WAS BEATING UP AN AUTISTIC KID. SO I GOT PISSED AND WENT UP TO HIM THEN THREW A LEFT HOOK TO THE SIDE OF THE JAW. THEN A RIGHT. THEN AFTER A MINUTE , HE WAS BLEEDING ON THE FLOOR. ( AS I REMIND YOU IM IN DAEP. AKA ALTERNATIVE SCHOOL FOR BEHAVIOR AND SHIT) SO IM THERE ON TOP OF THE BITCH STILL HITTING HIM WHEN ONE OF HIS FREINDS ATTACK ME. SO I GRABBED HIS LE… Read more
GENESIS 13 Abraham and Lot 1And Abram went up out of Egypt, he, and his wife, and all that he had, and Lot with him, into the south. 2And Abram was very rich in cattle, in silver, and in gold. 3And he went on his journeys from the south even to Beth-el, unto the place where his tent had been at the beginning, between Beth-el and Hai; 4unto the place of the altar, which he had made there at the first: and there Abram … Read more