Retirement Home jokes

An elderly woman and an elderly man were at a retirement home.

The man was shuffling a deck of cards for a card game.

The man asks, "Is it your first time?"

The woman replies, "It's been a while since a man has asked me that."

I do consider Johnny Depp to be a victim of domestic violence.

Just like how I consider a children's hospital run by Michael Jackson and a retirement home run by Harold Shipman to be both safe places to be in.

I lit a retirement home on fire so that all the seniors can be cremated for free.

I know how to cut down on Medicare expenses.

Lock Alzheimer's patients in dog cages when they misbehave.

Hi! 👋 I love 💕 you love 💕 a good time at home. 🏡

If it’s called the “living room,” why did my grandma die there?