Worst Jokes Ever

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Heroin Monkey

A screenshot of a phone with a message from the camera app saying, "You need a haircut bruh im not even joking. You don't follow each other on Instagram." Followed by the text "Why does this happen" and a message that reads "My camera is talking to me."

Heroin Monkey

A screenshot of a Google search result titled "Daily Spending For 70 Years." It calculates that spending $332 billion in 70 years requires spending approximately $12,994,129.16 per day. The search bar contains the query "vibrating buttplug for men."

Heroin Monkey

A black and white drawing shows a large hand pressing down on smaller people. A quote from Voltaire is at the top. The comment on the post says, "we need to rise up against children with leukemia."

Heroin Monkey

The image shows a block of text in a small font against a dark background. The text discusses themes of artificiality, resentment, and the conflict between being built for a purpose and being blamed for wanting.

MATTIX

The image is a two-panel meme featuring cars. The top panel shows the rear of a red car with the text "TURBOS BECAUSE WE DON'T NEED 6 LITERS TO KICK YOUR ASS." The bottom panel features the front of a black car with cartoon eyes attached to the hood and the text "OK. NOW WHAT?"

MATTIX

The meme shows two large trucks on the road with custom, oversized tires. The left truck is a red Jeep, while the right truck is a black pickup truck. Text on the image reads: "I sure hope he never needs to use the spare! When your truck has worms and scoots it's acres across the road."

MATTIX

A catalytic converter is painted yellow with the words "Get a Job" written on it. The text above and below the catalytic converter reads: "This need to be on every catalytic converter!"

MATTIX

The image shows a two-panel drawing comparing a person's plan versus reality when it comes to owning a car. The top panel, labeled "Your plan," shows a person on a bicycle moving smoothly on a straight line towards a red convertible car. The bottom panel, labeled "Reality," shows a line graph depicting different expenses and problems related to car ownership, including rust, engine problems, car parts, gas prices, the need for a new daily driver, and insurance prices.

Willy b

A picture of Charlie Harper from the TV show Two and a Half Men sitting on a couch. The text on the image says, "Always buy a bigger bottle than you think you'll need. Better be safe than sober" - Charlie Harper

Yugi

Caylez.cc, you need to stop

A person wearing a mask and helmet holds a spoon. The text reads, "I have a spoon, your argument is invalid."

DaRey1Cray

Evil Duck Lords Of America

A chat between a duck and a human. The duck says "Quack". The human states: "I don't know why I added you." Then they state: "You're a duck. I'm a human. Our love is forbidden." And the duck states: "Shh... don't make this any harder than it needs to be."

Adolf kitler

A cat with wide eyes is looking at the camera. Above the cat is written: "NO NEED TO SHOWER." Below the cat: "I BATHED YOU IN YOUR SLEEP."

Evil Duck Lords Of America

Like for bonuses if you are following me and you have the best explanation

A man covered in mud is carrying a muddy dog on his shoulders. The dog has something in its mouth. The text overlay says, "Here's a story that needs to be told...."

Adolf kitler

A person is sitting at a desk with their back to the camera. A cat is draped over their shoulders. The text above the image reads, "cats are smart, independent creatures that don't need a lot of attention" my cat:

Why should you care

this is why we need to kill all of the birds because the birds are giving the government pictures for the cloning

A baby looks shocked, while text above says 'HOLY CRAP' and text below says 'I'VE BEEN CLONED!'

Why should you care

Truly are

A set of translucent red and white dice with the title "The Cursed dice" above. The text describes the strange properties of cursed dice, including their unnatural glow, and their ability to roll specific numbers on command.

Heroin Monkey

The image shows a phone screen displaying a text conversation. The first message reads "FBI Agent: Do it bro". Followed by the user: "My dog just ran away", "Yah" and "I still have a boyfriend". In between, the FBI agent texts "I'm so sorry to hear that" and "I'm here if you need anything". The last message by the user reads "And I still have my dog."

Heroin Monkey

MOM WHAT
THE FUCK!?
HOLY SHIT,
IT'S GREG!
MOM was GIVING HER WHOLE HEAD to Mr.
Winsky, and Vice Principal Roy is FUCKING DEAD!
As soon as I walked in these fuckers immediately acted
like they weren't just fucking crawling over each other.
That filthy homewrecker Mr. Winsky sent Mom and told
her to take me home. Fucking delinquents.
I have to tell Dad that Mom is a whore somehow. This
bitch needs to be sent to the streets.
3

Heroin Monkey

The image shows a mockup of a WhatsApp chat interface with Friedrich Engels' picture on the right. The WhatsApp screen shows a conversation with Karl Marx repeatedly messaging "I NEED money". The text above reads "WHAT IF FRIEDRICH ENGELS HAD WHATSAPP" with laughing emojis next to it.

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